Ponderings on clean rooms…

Do all kids think all adults are morons? Or just mine?

My kids have chores to do on a daily basis. They are staying home in the mornings and I expect them to work. Now, we’re not talking about slave labor here, just a few things they need to do everyday before they go to the pool.

Today’s list was a short one:

I.Clean rooms

a.This includes picking up the trash on your floor and depositing in a trash can.

b.Cull through your closets and dressers and put any and all clothes you cannot wear or do not wear into a trash bag. I will check to see if you threw away your NICE clothing you insist you cannot wear, so don’t bother throwing them away.

c.Put away all clothes you can still wear. This does not mean wadding them up and chucking them into your dresser. Nor does this mean putting them in your dirty clothes hamper. (I give my youngest son the stinky eye because he does this once a week, at least)

d.Clean out from underneath your bed. Do not replace items under bed with new items.

e.Do not just throw the crap in your closets and close the doors. I know that trick.

f.Do not throw the crap behind your dresser. I know that trick, too.

g.Do not collect and throw the crap into one of the hall closets or the spare bedroom. I know that trick, too.

h.The beds should be made. This does not mean the beds should be covered with all the crap from your floor that you can’t hide in the closets or behind your dressers.

II.Feed Animals

a.This means put the food in the bowl first thing in the morning—NOT just before Mom comes home to check on things

b.Feeding the animals also means making sure they have fresh water. The water is not fresh if it’s put into a mossy bowl. If the bowl is green, clean it. It takes five minutes.

Before I come home at lunch to check on them, I call twice to help “manage” them.

“How’re the chores coming?”

“We’re almost done.”

“By your standards, my standards, or your daddy’s standards?” (daddy’s standards are higher than mine.)

“Your standards, but dad will be happy.”

I get home and what do I find?

Trash on the floors

I can’t see under the bed for all the crap.

I can’t open the closet doors because they are so packed.

Clean clothes in the hamper.

A green water bowl (Full of “fresh” water, of course)

So, I left them with instructions that now their father (High Priest of cleanliness) would be home in one hour and a half to check. If the rooms weren’t cleaned to HIS standards, no pool for a week.

These are the days of our lives…


They will never learn that we are not morons. I am convinced of this.

According to Mr. Clean, the rooms are still in the same state of chaos as they were this morning.

New deadline: 6pm

Added punishment if not complete on time: No pool for a week plus picking up trash at the park.

Like the sands through the hourglass…

1 thought on “Ponderings on clean rooms…

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