When Locusts Feed…


Here are my newest children. Aren’t they the cutest things?

This is Grant. He’s from Prestwick, Scotland–which is about 30 mins from Glasgow. He fancies women with an athletic build and can eat a large pizza on his own.

This is Simon. He’s from Birmingham, England–which has a population of about 9 million. He fancies women in general and loves Strawberry Jam sandwiches and Mars bars.

They both love Mountain Dew.

I have been to the grocery store everyday since Saturday. I refuse to go today. Surely they haven’t depleted our food stores again…

I’m not complaining–just laughing. These guys are great. They have become my oldest kids. I thought I was going to be the dirty old woman, ala Gabrielle in Desperate Housewives, but it turns out having these guys stay with us just brought out a stronger mother gene. Kinda disappointing, really. LOL

They call me “Mum” and Grant will occasionally call me Lassie. I love it. It’s awesome.

Last night, we took them to fishdog’s softball game. They hit on all the women. ” ‘ello, I’m Soimon. Wha’s yor name?” “Ah, ye’re a bonny lassie.”

Everytime a ball was pitched they’d yell “Hit it!” and when it was hit they’d yell “Catch it.” “Ah you couldn’t catch a cold!” I heard more than once. And the poor catcher for the other team…”Lassie, you might want te have the mitt looked at. I think it has a hole in it?” “Bobble it again?”

My co-worker Audrey played third base last night. The boys really took to her. “I love you, Audrey!” “Give us a wave, Audrey”

They started the Mexican Wave….it was a wave of two…but they made it look brilliant. Finally, 2 more folks joined in….A wave of four. I’ve never seen anything so grand.

I can’t believe how much I’m going to miss them when they leave. On the other hand, my pocketbook will be relieved.

5 thoughts on “When Locusts Feed…

  1. Will they be there to watch THE GAME on Saturday?If so, be prepared for much shouting at the TV!Glad the tea went well-and so proud of my country’s ambassadors behaving themselves.

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