I’m extremely excited about date night tonight! YAY!
Here’s my favorite baseball picture that I took in June 2010. The storm came and went and we got to watch the game pretty much all by ourselves!
When I was getting dressed this morning, my first thought as I was harnessing up the girls was “Sometimes wearing a bra crushes my soul.” And of course, that became my FB status. I told you I was feeling goofy.
Anyway, my fellow large-breasted women concur with my feelings. My soul hurts today. I am harnessed. I feel the need for FREEDOM!
Last night, the boys and I had such a good time just hanging out. I love my kids. I love it especially when they try to guilt me into giving them money. Hahahahaha. As if I ever feel guilt. Seriously. I mean, hahahaha, as if I ever have any money to give them. Seriously. They’re such funny boys and Mondays and Wednesdays at The Compound are always full of extra laughter.
Oh, I just want to give you guys fair warning, I’m planning to win both lotteries this week. Soon, I shall be blogging from our private island: Isla de MelJefe. There will be lots of gratuitous beach photos and I will be sure to include many of my personal cabana boys. (And Jefe’s cabana babe, for the men-folk.)
Also, we are thinking about adding ducks to the Compound! I will keep y’all posted. It all depends on winning the lottery and when we decide to move. Stay tuned!
Okay. I guess that’s all I got today. If you’re having a bad day, just remember: wine helps. If you’re always having a bad day, just remember: medication and therapy helps. If you can’t look at this picture without smiling, there is no hope for you.
And if this picture doesn’t make you LOL and possibly even snort, then I don’t even want to know you.
Bitchin' Fiction: Musings by author Melissa McKenzie / Melissa Francis 
First………Im going to need to talk to you about Rubes weight. AND y'all motherfuckers DO need Jesus!! Second……… I am putting in my application to be your personal assistant/chef/wine bitch after you win the lottery. (Let me translate: I want to get paid to get drunk and hang out with y'all)Third…….I think ducks are in order at the compound. I think it will be entertaining to see how the dogs react to them AND more importantly it will entertain my minion for endless hours!!Ready for Cinco De Mel-O. I hope the weather hold out. If not I say Dollar General rain ponchos and party on Garth!!
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1. LOL! Poor Ruby. She just wants to be loved and so she eats to numb her emotions. 2. You're hired.3. Ducks will be fun! I think Ruby and a Duck will be awesome to watch.4. NOTHING WILL STOP CINCO DE MEL-O!
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I love Rubes just the way she is!!!YAY hurry up and winI think Bella and the ducks will be hilarious since they will be bigger than she is.BRING ON THE FUN!!
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Hilarity!!!! Ruby done blowed up! I would like to apply to be your duck waker…and Party on Wayne!
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Hilarity!!!! Ruby done blowed up! I would like to apply to be your duck waker…and Party on Wayne!
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Hilarity!!!! Ruby done blowed up! I would like to apply to be your duck waker…and Party on Wayne!
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Holy triplicate!
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MARISSA! you were just so excited you got to comment that you outdid yourself! LOLYou can totally be the duck walker.
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That is absolutely what happened there. I couldn't believe that it actually let me participate!
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