#RWA13 I miss y’all!

Here are some pics of the Ghosts of RWA Conferences Past. Me and Maria Geraci in order: Dallas 04, Atlanta 06, Dallas 07

Mel_Maria Dallas

Mel_Maria.ATL 06


Then here’s a pic of us in Orlando: 09 (this is actually the RT convention.)

RT09RWA was in DC in 09 and I was there, too. Here’s a link to the most awesome night ever…. Drag Queen Karaoke

I can’t find a picture of me and Maria together in DC. I know there is one…but, this will have to do as a substitute:

DC 09I miss my people! I vow to attend next year, no matter what. (she says, hoping that her empty wallet and dry writing well will fill up soon…)

In Compound Bootcamp Bootyville news, I rested last night. Will be doing major lower body damage to myself this evening. It will be painful and tomorrow I will be using a walker. With hot pink tennis balls for feet.

To all my friends in Atlanta, I miss you. I’m thinking about you. And if you do Drag Queen Karaoke night…PLEASE SEND ME ALL THE PICTURES! Also, good luck to you, my dear friend Maria! Bring home that RITA and make momma proud!

let’s have a little chat…

My dear Friends of the Internetz,

You may remember me sharing several of my dirty little secrets with you in the past. No, I’m not talking about my Naughty River for Blue’s Clues Steve, or my White Trash Crushes…I’m talking about when I shared the only thing Sarah Jessica Parker and I have in common: Man Hands.

It’s true. We both have them. And I have to tell you, I’m ready to do something about mine. El Jefe thinks I’m just this side of crazy when I talk about my Man Hands. I’ll admit they are tiny in size, especially compared to his…but…my fingers are like little stuffed sausages and my fingernails are awful. They don’t really grow; and they are wide. They just don’t seem very feminine to me–therefore they are Man Hands. I’m thinking it’s time to try to fix them.

Apparently you can’t do liposuction on your fingers (Not that I’ve checked…) and apparently, having big knuckles and tiny stumpy fingers isn’t really something plastic surgeons can fix (what? I’m making an assumption here. I swear!) So I think I’m going to go a different route.

I’m going to get a manicure.

I’m going to see if I can make my Man Hands into Drag Queen Hands pretty, feminine girly hands, just by adding polish and trying to grow the nails out. I can’t do the fake nail thing. It’s just not my bag. But apparently there is this polish called Shellac that is guaranteed to last 2 weeks, even on the toughest customer. That would be me.

So next week, I’m gonna go for it. I’m going to attempt to put lipstick on a pig and pretty up my Man Hands. If you have any other suggestions for me, please weigh in…

drag queens + karaoke = win #rwa09

You can view the whole album here. I must warn you, some pics are not pretty. Most–are well worth looking at.

So after the literacy signing on Wednesday night (I’ll post those pics later, I just figured we should start off with a bang here) a group of Romance Divas decided to hit the drag (bar) like we did in Dallas a couple years ago.

We hit the jackpot when we found Remington’s. Seriously, this place was dream come true for us Divas. They welcomed us women with open arms. And we accepted their welcome gleefully. Here, let me show you:

Lisa and I got pulled up on stage to dance back up….
Chelsea is our other backup dancer…
took this one with my cell phone. She was my favorite!

After the show we trounced upstairs and took over. A couple of regulars (who could really actually sing) didn’t seem to appreciate our version of karaoke. You know what version I’m talking about right? The ‘I can’t really sing but who gives a rat’s ass because this is fun’ version. Pictures…let me show you them.

Vivienne Westlake owning the mic
Me and Christina “singing” I’LL THINK OF A REASON LATER (though, truth be told, we already have our reasons…)
and me and Jen “singing” COPACABANA. Yes, we put on quite the show…
I think I was a mic hog which is honestly, quite unfortunate.

A good time was had by all. My fave part of the night (besides being molested by a Drag Queen) was when the New Yorker (Jen) busted out the cabbie for going way out of his way to get us to our destination. She pulled out her iPhone map and he nearly died. He said, “Sometimes the cheapest way isn’t always the best way.” Uh huh. Tell that to someone who doesn’t live in Manhattan buddy.

More pics soon….