Monthly Archives: June 2009

a walk to remember (NOT the book)

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Last night I tortured forced Rader to go to the Big Dam(n) Bridge and walk with me. You’d a thought I was plucking his toenails off with tweezers. It was “THE WORST THING EVER.” As a matter of fact, after the 45 minutes (remember I usually walk an hour plus–I cut it short just for his whiny butt) we got into the car and he immediately sent me a text message.

That sucked.

Good to know, but too bad.

Anyway, while I was walking and he was whining, we passed a section of woods that nearly knocked me over with memories. I smelled wild grapes and muscadines. (BTW, my spell check doesn’t recognize the word muscadine. WTF?)

Growing up, we had a small orchard with green apple, plum, peach, pear and loads of pecan trees. And we also had wild grapes growing on the fence of our property. My neighbors grew muscadines.

The smell of that wild fruit yesterday took me back to my childhood immediately. I know memories and smell are strongly connected, but it still shocks me when I’m damn near catapulted back into the 80s.

I used to walk along the fence and pluck the honeysuckle that grew among the grapes. (fresh honeysuckle is still one of my all time favorite smells) The grapes were NEVER any good, but every year I would hope they would be. I don’t know how many sour grapes I ate trying to find the one sweet wonder. It never happened, but I never stopped trying.

(Okay, I take that back, I did finally stop trying when I was attacked by a Blue Jay. That stupid bugger wanted me dead. I had to run across 5 acres of land to escape the blue devil. Totally uncool.)

Had my first sip of homemade muscadine wine when I was a teenager. It was so sweet. And my neighbors made muscadine jelly which was fantastic. After the Blue Jay incident, I would sneak over and sit beneath the neighbors’ muscadine vines and enjoy the smell because I missed my grapes.

Do you have any old memories attached to smell? Any recent ones?

T-Minus 4 weeks

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BITE ME! will be on the shelves 4 weeks from tomorrow.

Can you freaking believe it? I can’t.

It’s been a long time coming. I sold the book to HarperCollins in 2.5million years ago– January 2007. One thing about this business, every publisher moves at a different pace, and to the author, it always feels slow.

Explaining that I sold the book but it’s not on the shelves yet has become second nature to me. Kinda like saying hello. I’ve had people ask, “Are you sure you’re published?” And I would say, “I’ve sold the book, it will be published and on the shelves summer 2009.”

I can’t wait to celebrate. We’re having a huge party Sunday August 2nd. If you’re in Little Rock or can make it here, you’re cordially invited. Email me: tellmel@melissafrancis.net if you’re interested in details. I can’t believe I’ll be signing books soon. My very own book. The one I wrote. The one with my name on the cover. Yup. That one.

4 weeks from tomorrow, little Melissa McKenzie (now Francis) from Bryant, Arkansas, is going to have her first book available for purchase. Who’d a thunk it?

Farrah, Friday, and Fun

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Once my coffee kicks in, I’m going to clean this morning, then have lunch with writing pal Kait Nolan as she drives through town. Then I head to the lake to spend time with my parents and Rader. Ian has returned from his week-long trip in Dallas. I’ve missed him terribly, but he’s not going to the lake with us this weekend. At 15, he’s just too cool for that kinda thing.

In other news, I’m really sad about Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson, but I have to say, I’m really irritated at the media for spending so much time on MJ’s death. Farrah battled cancer for three years and did it with dignity and grace. Growing up, I didn’t know any girl who didn’t wanna be her, and I didn’t know any boy who didn’t wanna do her.

I stared at this poster every morning for years. I went blond, feathered my hair, and bought a red bathing suit. I never quite got there, but I wanted it.

Most people remember Farrah from Charlie’s Angels, but I remember her from Logan’s Run. As a matter of fact, I had a Logan’s Run beach towel.

RIP Farrah. I’ll always be a fan.

wildlife walkabout

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Last night I went for a walk with @jennchristman down by the river. Instead of just walking back and forth on the Big Dam(n)Bridge, we kept going into Burns Park along the banks of the Arkansas River. It was a gorgeous night (see sunset pic for proof) and even though it was a little humid, it wasn’t unbearable. Besides, humidity is good for the skin. Why do you think I look so hot at 40?

As we were solving the world’s problems (for example: Rachel Ray needs a new stylist in a major way, Rock of Love was totally underrated, and we should all talk like Caroline from Real Housewives of NJ) there was a rustling in the high grass over to our left.

It was a tiny little thing rustling around and at first I thought it was a puppy. As I approached the little animal, I quickly saw the shock of white down the middle of its black fur. No, this was not Rover, it was Pepe Le Pew.

“Back away slowly from the skunk. I don’t wanna take a tomato juice bath tonight.”

“Seriously? Tomato juice?”

“Yeah. I think. Or lemon. Or maybe it’s vinegar. I dunno. I just don’t wanna bathe in whatever it is you have to. Skunk Funk is not a fragrance I’m willing to try.”

“I’ve never seen one live. I mean seriously, they’re all dead and stinking up the roadways.”

“I’ve never seen one not in a zoo.”

After 45 minutes, we turn around and go back toward the bridge. Our conversation has moved toward more serious topics like the pros and cons of saving some calories for booze instead of cutting out booze all together, Jazzercise is still alive and kicking, weight training and the hot dudes who offer to ‘spot you,’ and how to get rid of the world of all mean people. (We have a plan, so if you’re mean, get ready.)

That’s when the attack started. Out of nowhere these stupid giant horseflies started dive-bombing us. One hit me in the ear and I’m pretty sure I have hearing loss as a result. They quickly left me alone though and started chasing Jenn. I guess she smells sweeter than me because they were all about her. There were three of them, all were huge, at least an inch long, and landing on her back and buzzing her head. Finally I told her to hand me her awesome ROCK OF LOVE baseball hat and let me swat them. I defended her honor. I was her white knight. I’m officially the butch in our friendship. That’s okay with me. I’m the cutest butch ever.

“I hate nature.”

“No you don’t.”

“I totally hate nature.”

“Shut up.”

“Tell me you hate nature, too.”

“Nope. I love it. I could pitch a tent right here, and pee in the woods.”

“You totally are the butch.”

About five minutes later, there was another rustling and a group of folks was gathered around a tree. I thought maybe it was an Opossum but no. It was an armadillo.

“I really hate nature.”

“Seriously! We’ve seen two animals LIVE that
usually we only see dead. That’s awesome.”

“Nature sucks.”

Our walk was an hour and a half long and apparently sponsored by Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom.<–and if you don’t get that reference, I’m too old or you’re too young. I’m going with the latter.

ack!

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I didn’t blog yesterday! WTF, dude? My only excuse is that I didn’t get much sleep the night before and just flat out forgot. My bad.

I really wish I had something enlightened to share with you today, or a good story, but not really.

This week is British Soccer camp week. Those of you who are regular readers of my blog, know what a fan of British Soccer Camp I am… For the 1st time in 4 years we’re not hosting any coaches–which is a good thing, because when we do host, I tend to NEVER sleep. The lads are always entertaining. (and very easy on the eyes)

I hit the gym and the track yesterday for the first time in a few weeks. Did circuit room, abs, and walked 4 miles in about 45 minutes. I’m sore today. Feeling it big time. But I’m glad I went. I’m gonna blog over at Fat Chicks Running this afternoon about my time on the walking track. It’s pretty funny. I’m apparently a ‘rule breaker.’ I know–you’re shocked!

Ian has been in Dallas for a week watching his cousin play some kick ass soccer in a National Tournament. Taylor’s team is now in the finals. Am hoping to get some pics soon to post for ya soon.

That’s about all that’s going on here. Nothing witty or snappy today. I’m just too tired. Maybe I’ll be able to muster up funny for tomorrow.

Stay tuned.

What’s going on this week with you guys?

totally manic

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I’m at Ficitonistas this morning talking about Dares.

Last night, my friend Jen and I met up with some friends from high school who traveled from 3 corners of the world (Seattle, Boston, New Zealand) just to visit us. (okay, maybe not ONLY to visit us, but whatever) We had a great time, and it was hard to let it go and say goodbye.

I feel very lucky these guys are still in my life after all these years.
Laughter is truly good for the soul. After last night, my soul is set.

Jr Chef

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My youngest son has always enjoyed helping out in the kitchen. I first noticed it a few Thanksgivings ago, when he was curious about how I make pies: specifically the pumpkin pie which is is favorite. Since then, I’ve been encouraging him to help out when he can.

He’s 11 now and so yesterday I decided it was time for him to learn to cook. We’re going to do a new recipe once a week over the summer. We’re going to shop for the ingredients, discuss any adjustments we’d like to make, and then cook.

For our first lesson, we started out with this recipe from the Whole Foods website: Cheesy Lasagna Rolls

We hit the grocery store, bought the ingredients. Once we got home, we set out everything we were going to need and got started. We decided to add a couple of more cheeses to the stuffing and make it a 3-cheese stuffed roll, decided against adding a meat this time, but think bacon or sausage would be fantastic in this. I’m also pretty sure I would love to add artichokes and may try that next time.

The basic ingredients are spinach, marinara sauce, and ricotta cheese (we added mozzarella and parmesan into the ricotta mixture) And of course lasagna noodles. We used 7.

Rader is adding sea salt to the water to boil our noodles.

When your noodles are al dente, you lay them flat, spread cheese, marinara, and layer some spinach on the noodle.
Then you roll up the noodle

And place it upright in the pan

Once you’ve placed all the rolls in the pan, spoon remaining marinara over each roll, sprinkle with mozzarella (and Parmesan) and bake 20 minutes at 400 degrees or until golden brown

They were DELICIOUS! and so easy.

Cheesy Stuffed Lasagna Rolls from Wholefoods.com

Salt
1/2 pound (8 to 10) uncooked lasagna noodles
Nonstick cooking spray
1 cup ricotta cheese
1 1/2 cups prepared marinara sauce
1 1/2 cups packed baby spinach
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella

We added Mozzarella and Parmesan into the Ricotta as well, and made them 3-cheese rolls

Method

Preheat oven to 400°F. Meanwhile, bring a large pot of salted water to a boil, add noodles and cook until al dente, 8 to 10 minutes. Drain well and gently transfer to a clean work surface.

Grease a small roasting pan or casserole dish with cooking spray; set aside. Working with one noodle at a time, spread with about 2 tablespoons of the ricotta and 2 tablespoons of the marinara then top with spinach. Starting at one end, roll up noodle snugly then arrange in pan either seam-side down or with the rolls close enough together to hold each other closed. Pour remaining marinara over assembled rolls then sprinkle with mozzarella and bake until golden and bubbly, 20 to 25 minutes.

chef crushes

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Before I launch into my true blog for the day, can I just say, I don’t really have an issue with the host of Top Chef Masters, but honestly, if you’re going to have a spokesperson on a show that centers around good food, you might wanna consider using someone that DOESN’T NEED TO EAT A FREAKING BATTERED AND DEEP FRIED SANDWICH SLATHERED IN MAYO. Girl needs to eat. A lot. I don’t care how acclaimed she is in food journalism, Kelly Choi needs to put some meat on her bones. Is she just chewing the food and spitting it out? Srsly.

Okay, now on to the real topic:

After last week’s Top Chef Masters, I totally fell in love with Texan Tim Love and Frenchman Hubert Keller. Two completely different personalities, two completely different cooking styles, one end result: Twu Wub.

I was already excited to see that Wylie Dufresne was going to be on last night’s Top Chef Masters because I had developed a huge crush on his geeky-sciencey cooking style when he served as a judge on Top Chef. There’s just something about him that totally makes me melt. But last night, I had to share some of my Wylie crush with his friend, Graham Elliot Bowles. One of the other chefs commented that the two pals were like the Mutt and Jeff show–and she was right. And I was totally smitten. I just wanted to follow them around and giggle as they played off each other, and as they played together in the kitchen, while cooking their butts off.

There’s something inherently sexy about a man who can cook. I love watching them slice, dice, marinate, and reduce. I love the fantasy of cooking lessons: him behind me with his big arms wrapped around me, teaching me a proper technique, or feeding me a spoonful of whatever’s cooking so that I can have the first taste. It makes me swoon.

And I love the type of chef who doesn’t ‘fit the mold’ of what you would think a chef would be like. Such as Country Boy Tim Love, Geeky Wylie Dufresne, and Tattooed-and-Goofy Huggy Bear Graham Elliot Bowles.

So now I have three restaurants that I must try: Tim Love’s Flagship Restaurant The Lonesome Dove in Ft. Worth, TX

Wylie’s WD~50 in Manhattan

and

Graham’s Chicago-based Graham Elliot

So, who’s coming with me?

Are y’all watching Top Chef Masters? What do you think?

the girls at beaver lake

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heh. I am just going to stay away from the obvious porn joke.

We had a glorious three days on the lake, just me and my girls. We had a lot of fun conversations, a few serious conversations, a fair amount of adult beverages, and an all-around good time.

Let me show you:

This was the view from the cabin deck. Gorgeous, no?

Me on the last morning at the lake. A summer storm blew in and blew out and we had a gloriously beautiful last day.


This is the large waterfall. See the rainbow? I spent an hour looking for the pot-o-gold. Apparently I only have massive amounts of luck finding 4-leaf clovers…

This is the small waterfall. The water is the prettiest blue-green.


The lagoon at the small waterfall. D calls this place Shangri-La

Me on the boat. This is living!


The large waterfall

another view of the large waterfall

Me, D, and LB hanging out in the awesome falls.

Four Broads on a Boat.

the upcoming week…

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It’s Monday, and of course, I’m blogging over at Fictionistas. Pop over and say hi.

I’m currently at Beaver Lake with my girlfriends having a very good time. Look, read about last year’s trip here: Tales From Beaver Lake
For a funny bit of trivia, I just got a pedicure this weekend and my toes are painted Lizard Green. I love them.

Apparently last year, before I went on this very same trip, I had my toes painted the very same green.

This year’s toes:

Last year’s toes:

I’ll blog lots when I get back–I’m sure I’ll have loads of material, just not sure I’ll be able to actually share any of it.