Gadgets and gidgets and gobots?

Well, no Gobots. Not really. But for old time’s sake, here’s a bit of nostalgia for you readers who have been around for a while. Like me.

Is it just me, or were the Gobots just the poor man’s Transformer?

Anyway…so many of y’all have noticed my health, fitness, OMG I’m trying to eat better! shift in my blog. I used to use my Fat Chicks Running blog for that, but I’ve just decided to move it all here. One stop shopping, so to speak.

Well, since I’ve been adding more food/fitness blogs to my content, I’ve had some awesome private messages and texts, all encouraging and many giving me advice.

My friend Amy (who I used to work with in Oxford) messaged me last night about this wonder product she’s using to help her with low carb and less processed foods eating.

The GEFU Spirelli Spiral Cutter

This magic tool of awesome lets you cut veggies into spiral so you can have fake pasta! Tough veggies like Sweet Potatoes. Or Zucchini. Mmmmm. It is on my must buy list.

Last night was workout #2 at Melf’s Bootay Compound Bootcamp of Bootyliciousness. I focused on arms and shoulders and of course, abs. It was just me and Ruby and Big Baby last night. Rader had dinner with his Nonnie. Which was just as well. It was an ugly work out. U.G.L.Y. But I feel great today, even if I am a bit sore.

Okay, Bitches. I have a dreaded meeting in 45 minutes. I’ve eaten my breakfast, I’ve fueled up on coffee, and I’m sparkling like champagne. Y’all be good today. Or at least, be good at it!

Meet Sally Sparkle

Ain’t she pretty? Happy Balemtime’s Day to me!!

We make a perfect couple.


Hope y’all have a great VD. Be sure and take your cootie shots! Hope you get lots of sugar from your sweetie!

very smart

I have no car payment…and I haven’t had one in years. You would think this would be fabulous…except I’m paying out the wazoo (official term) for gas.

THIS is what I want to get. No I’m not kidding.  Yes, in these colors…light blue with a red interior and red top. (Carpet matches the drapes, HEY OH!) With the estimated car payment and gas combined would be less than what I’m paying now.

You know my MELF license plate will look awesome on this baby. You also know I’ll look awesome driving this baby around…

Fingers crossed we can work something out. The fact that the closest dealer is in Jackson, MS sucks, but hey, that would give me just one more reason to stop by Oxford and play on my way home, right?

we just had ourselves a little Journey moment…

Yes, I’m a little bit excited about this:

Journey, Pat Benatar, and Loverboy in concert….

I even wore Rock-n-Roll hair today to celebrate the awesome. (actually, I wore bed-head hair as rock-n-roll hair but whatever.) See y’all at Verizon on October 9!

BTW, Hit Me With Your Best Shot was once upon a time my go to Karaoke song… There is a picture somewhere from a certain bachelorette party with me and my “date” for the night, (we named him Big Bob) “singing” a duet. Of course Big Bob was so full of hot air that he didn’t really sing at all.

Also, Journey has some of my all time favorite songs ever. Good Morning, Girl has always put a smile on my face…even if it is only 1 minute 44 seconds long.

Happy Friday y’all! Get your rock-n-roll hair on and have your own Journey moment this weekend!

Maria Geraci: A GIRL LIKE YOU

Today is release day for my BFF writer friend in Florida…This is her 4th book. You better get your happy-ass out there and buy it. Especially if you enjoy reading, fun, love, more fun, and good writing.

This woman knows how to tell a story. Period.


Every ugly duckling is a swan in waiting…

Emma Frazier is smart, hardworking, and loves her job as a journalist for a Florida lifestyle magazine. Emma knows she’s no great beauty, but she’s pretty certain she has a shot with her handsome new boss, Ben Gallagher—until Emma overhears a mutual acquaintance refer to her as the “ugly friend.” In an effort to reclaim her battered self-esteem, Emma decides to impress Ben at work by promising an exclusive interview with NASCAR legend, Trip Monroe.

Emma and Trip went to high school together and although it’s been fourteen years since they’ve spoken, Emma is certain she can score an interview with the elusive super star. But connecting with Trip turns out to be harder than Emma imagined. Her quest for the interview leads her back to her tiny hometown of Catfish Cove, where old secrets and a new romantic interest shake up Emma’s views on life and teach her that maybe the key to finding true love is as simple as accepting yourself for the person you were always meant to be.

Maria and Mel
Maria and Mel

I love you, my friend.

Public Service Announcement

Dear Ladies with Breastesess,

(I’m talking to you of the actual DD+ cup size)

I have discovered Victoria’s Secret.

Apparently their soul purpose is to cater to those of the small breasts…to make them feel better about themselves. Which is a very valiant purpose, if indeed those who are less blessed in the chesticle area need to have their spirits lifted. However, it’s false advertising when someone like myself who wants a bra that fits and makes me look like Heidi Klum with more curves. Because Vicki’s Secret is they don’t measure a cup past DD. So I’ve been a DD for a long time. And that was wrong. So very wrong.

Yesterday, I wore a strapless dress and by the end of the afternoon, I was very distressed by the state of my girls. They seemed very sad. They were giving up. So I drove myself straight to Dillard’s and begged for help.

Let me just tell you, the twins are very happy with their new zip code and housing units.

Ladies. Please…go somewhere other than Vicki to be measured. Dillard’s, Nordstroms, Barbara Graves (in Little Rock)… Your girls will appreciate it. And so will your back.

I promise. 

Celebrate your curves! As my girl Tori said while strapping me in yesterday…”Not every woman is as blessed as you. So wrap them up like they are a prize.”

I am very blessed, indeed.

[insert witty title of your choice]

Gonna take care of some business on the front end… You know I write the recaps for The Bachelor/Bachelorette over at Hey Don’t Judge Me right? Well, I have some very good news…Starting in July, I’ll be recapping Season 1 of Once Upon a Time…2 shows a week to bring us to the beginning of Season 2 in September! So…Please bookmark Hey Don’t Judge Me and like our Facebook page. We have some fantastic writers over there who recap and review all sorts of shows and movies and what not. For example, we added Dr. Who this week. I KNOW RIGHT? Awesome.

Oh. and now I have a Tumblr account because Stoney told me to get one. And I always do what I’m told. So I’ll be posting little what nots about the shows I’m recapping there. And other what nots. There will probably be posts about wine. And possibly some talk about the zombie apocalypse. I might even solve the world’s problems. So if you’re into that sorta thing, follow me. If not, well, why are you reading my blog anyway?

In news of discovery, I have been totally using El Jefe’s razor, and I am now going to have to go get my own, because WOW. This thing works! My legs are awesome. AND now they are smoov too!

Seriously. The battery power makes all the difference.

 Hmmm. What else is going on? Today is the longest day of the year…and I’m stuck at work instead of soaking up all the sunshine at the lake. I think this should be a mandatory day off…don’t you?

red couches are awesome and a happy ending

I love our new couch! It’s comfy, cozy and RED! I had to cover it up this morning because when I got home yesterday after work, Ruby had decided she could, in fact, jump up on the couch. It’s funny that when we’re home, how her legs suddenly stop working and she has to beg us for help. Our help is in the form of a Harry Potter pillow on the floor. “Get on your pillow, Ruby.” and she does. But when no one is at home, she thinks the couch is her domain. Hmph.

Speaking of pet domains…

The bed is so high off the ground that only Clementine can jump up. Ruby struggles even with her step-stool and Trin Trin just can’t jump that high anymore. Which leads me to a story of love and trust:

Once upon a time, about 18 months ago, an awesome Red-head and an awesome Jefe started dating. Jefe had two dogs, one who loved the red-head without question, and the other who could only look at the red-head if Jefe was in the room. And even then, it was with a side glance. There was no trust between this dog and the red-head.

Time passed and the dog started allowing the red-head to feed her snacks and occasionally let her outside. Eventually Jefe and the dog moved to Arkansas, and the dog slowly warmed up the the red-head and her two boys. But still, there wasn’t much love or trust–just appreciation for land and treats.

Several more months pass, and the dog seems to have developed a love for the red-head. Well, maybe not love, but a strong like–an affection. The dog greets the red-head with excitement when she comes home for work and sleeps next to her on the bed in the mornings. The red-head is very pleased with the progress as this dog is very loving and loyal to her people. Well her Person. The red-head is starting to feel a little bit like she belongs to the dog, even if only on the periphery.

Which brings us to today, when the dog wanted on the bed (see above). The dog asked the red-head for help by nosing her leg and panting. The dog then allowed the red-head to lift her onto the bed without a hesitation or a growl.

The red-head now believes she may actually be considered one of the dog’s people. Not completely, but there is at least love and trust now. The Red-Head is very happy.

I love happy endings, don’t you? (ahem…c’mon guys! This is a PG-13 blog. Sorta.)

Happy Friday, bitches! And to all the awesome moms out there, enjoy your weekend! 

From 12:00-2:00

Our furniture is being delivered today. Let us hope it’s closer to 12:00 than 2:00.

Oh wait. I still need to vacuum where the bed is going. I ran out of time this morning. So maybe I should be hoping it’s closer to 2:00 than 12:00…

Either way, YAY FURNITURE!

You know, I understand that these delivery dudes have to schedule multiple deliveries on a single day, but I find it so frustrating that I have to plan a 2 (ok, more likely 4) hour chunk out of my day to be there. It wasn’t free delivery…we’re paying these dudes to deliver and set up. So really? Please don’t make it a 4 hour wait time. You said 12-2…and I’m gonna hold you to it. Mmmmkay?

Let’s see…what else is going on….

Well it’s mother’s day weekend and it looks like the kids will be serving an awesome group of moms brunch on Sunday at the Partyhood. Aw yeah. I think they should wear uniforms and everything…. I believe there will be Bloody Marys and Mimosas involved in this affair, so we will be winning the Mothers of the Year award again. Because obviously, we are.

Clementine is missing Bobcat Greyskull. Well, she’s not “missing” his sneak attacks and his pouncing ninja moves, but she is obviously feeling his absence. She’s been sleeping with us every night, which is highly unusual for her. And she’s also not like other cats…when you roll over, she doesn’t jump up and move…she’s like a lump on a log. Dead weight. Warm and fuzzy dead weight…

See where Ruby and Clementine’s butts meet? That’s where my leg belongs….

It’s Thursday, bitches! The weekend is almost here. Let’s get our party on!

check it out!

we have a new bed and new couch being delivered this weekend! Yippee!

I can’t wait to decorate. Yes. I’m a girl. It’s so nice to finally have something that we picked out as opposed to the furniture that was donated to me when I moved. My friends are so generous, and I have loved and appreciated everything they’ve done for me…but yay for new stuff!!

Also I got to move my table home this weekend. It’s a beautiful rosewood table with matching coffee table made from the leaves. I’ll post pics of the room next week once the furniture is delivered.

Happy Tuesday!