Well, that was fun.

Yesterday was very draining. I know people have a bad day and have no issues with telling the world, but when you’re a sponge like I am, you soak up the energy around you. And yesterday, the energy around me was pissy. Negative, bitchy, petty and stressful.

And I was in such a good mood when I got to work! UGH.

So I went home, fired up the grill (QUEEN OF THE GRILL!) and became one with my center. Or at least I tried to. Thank the gods El Jefe makes me laugh. Same with Rader. I needed the laughter badly.

Rader offered to pour me “all the wine” last night. hahaha. I had to decline though, since I’m kinda on the wine wagon during the week. (most of the week, anyway. I chose wine over workout on Tuesday since it was storming.) I did some stretches and grilling and then got all the loves from the puppies and kittehs and my personal Fabio… and by the end of the night, I was all better.

And today, I’m rarin’ to go. I’m also in rare form. Look out world…I’ve got my sparkle turned up to 11 and I don’t care if you’re wearing shades or not!

I can be snarky and funny and a smartass, but I’m rarely negative. I enjoy happiness and smiling at people so they will smile back. I may have a rant or two on occasion, but it’s mostly just me being silly. I will say what most of y’all are thinking. I’m awesome like that, you see.

So today, I’m in a good place and I’m not going to allow any of the crabby people crawl into my happiness bubble full of sunshine and butterflies. And unicorns that fart rainbows.

Because EVERYONE wants a rainbow farting unicorn in their life. Duh.


bear with me while I get a little philosophical

Or you could BARE with me and take your clothes off…

A friend of mine posted this link on Facebook yesterday and it really spoke to me. It sums up exactly what I’ve been trying to do for the past few years of my life. I’ve realized lately that I’ve been letting a lot of negative people and actions take over my generally happy disposition and I’m working hard to rectify that.

Happiness is very much a state of mind (unless there is an underlying medical reason involved. And if that is the case, please don’t ignore it, or self-medicate it, or just hope it will pass. Depression and bipolar disorder, etc. are not things you hope will go away. They can affect every part of your life and there is no shame in seeking help. /mothering moment). Anyway, as I was saying, happiness is often a choice. You can choose to dwell on the crap in your life that is weighing you down or you can choose to appreciate the good you have. You can let life happen to you or you can make life happen.

I made a list yesterday, and I’m not kidding myself that everything is perfect, like unicorns farting sparkles, sunshine and butterflies, or Adam Levine naked cooking me dinner…but when I look at the good I have and compare it to the negative, I’m winning.

That’s right, Charlie Sheen. WINNING. (don’t reenact scenes from Platoon with Charlie Sheen)

Here are a few of the list of 15 items from the article that I’ve been really working on.

1. LOVE vs. FEAR. Well, I can tell you for sure that those people who are really happy, FEAR less and LOVE a lot more. They see each moment, each challenge, each person as an opportunity to discover more about themselves and the world around them.

Of course there are things I’m afraid of in life, but I will tell you, I’m not afraid of being hurt. Sure it sucks, but each painful experience I’ve had, no matter how devastating it was to me at the time, has made me stronger. I try to love with all I have and if that love/friendship is rejected, it will not reflect on me or my lack of giving or trying.

3. FORGIVENESS vs. UNFORGIVENESS. Really happy people know that it’s not healthy to hold on to anger. They choose to FORGIVE and FORGET, understanding that FORGIVENESS is  a gift they give to themselves first and foremost.

I actually forgive more than I should, sometimes. However, it is sometimes hard for me to let go and forget. This is something I’ve been struggling with for years and have started really focusing on truly forgiving and letting go.

4. TRUST vs. DOUBT. They trust themselves and they trust the people around them. No matter if they talk to the cleaning lady or the C.E.O. of a multi billion company, somehow they always seem make the person they are interacting with feel like there is something unique and special about them.

They understand that beliefs become self-fulfilling prophecies, and because of that, they make sure to treat everybody with love, dignity and respect, making no distinctions between age, sex, social status, color, religion or race. These are the great men that Mark Twain was talking about: “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” Mark Twain

I am a very trusting person and I’m proud that I surround myself with people I can trust. The problem is, when my trust is broken, I struggle with the forgive and forget part….

 12. GRATITUDE vs. INGRATITUDE. No no matter where they look, no matter where they are or with who, they have this capacity of seeing beauty where most of us would only see ugliness, opportunities, where most of us would only see struggles, abundance where most of us would only see lack and they express their gratitude for them all.

If everyone focused on being grateful for what they have, we’d all be happier. Hence my list making…and damn, I have no reason to be ungrateful. I’m a very lucky woman.

Okay, sorry for being all serious and stuff. I’m just really tired of negativity and I’m really focusing on fixing my attitude. I can only be responsible for my outlook on life. I know that no matter what happens to me, I’ll be okay. I want to put good out into the world so good will come back to me. It works. Everyone should try it!

Now for some less serious stuff, I posted some fun things on Pinterest yesterday. You know I’m not that active there, but when I am, I always find good stuff! hah!

Also, check out the most pitiful pug known to man. Oh my, Ruby. Why so sad?

cracked up

Last night, the boys and I were watching Family Guy together and goofing off. My kids crack me up. Both boys are able to combine typical sophomoric boy humor with some pretty adult thinking. It’s fun to hang out with them and listen to them crack on each other and crack on me.

When we’re being silly, they sometimes forget I’m the momma. Last night was one of those times. My 11 year old was on the phone with a friend from Oxford.

Me: Is that your girlfriend?

11: No it’s I.

Me: So it is your girlfriend.

Takes a moment to register

11: quick flick of middle finger. Then wide eyes and open mouth when he realizes he just flipped his mother off. Then bright red cheeks and so much laughter he had to hang up the phone.

Me: Um. Did you forget I’m the momma?

11: giggle. giggle. giggle.

15: Dude, you’re stoopid.

11: I can flip you off so you better shut up.

Then the threats of farting on each others’ faces began and it all went downhill.

Pretty much the perfect night. Stupid boys.

[insert title here]

I am not feeling particularly witty or bloggy today. But I have been a good blogger lately, so I thought I would continue the trend.

Did you know this is NaBloPoMo? Yes, instead of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) they’ve created a National Blog Posting Month. My friends and very witty bloggers, Killer and Liz, are participating. You should go check them out. There’s no telling what today’s topic will be. Usually it’s balls, or farts, or booze–sometimes their blogss hit the tri-fecta and cover all three topics in one post! I’ve been so buried in my cave, I haven’t even been able to read all their posts for the month, yet. But I have them marked unread on my google reader so I can go back and enjoy them when I finish the book.

Speaking of the book and balls–yesterday sucked monkey balls. Blech. I wrote 3 pages. I couldn’t concentrate. I am my own worst enemy when it comes to distraction. I can be sitting in a dark room with nothing but a laptop and before you know it, I’ve been playing with a piece of lint on my shirt for an hour. Seriously, focus is not my friend.

But today is another day.

is in town now. Wonder if he’ll stay out of my hair. If the man wanted hair, he could try to regrow his own, you know?

Oh, and to the person in Iowa who googled:

my farts smell disgusting what is wrong with me

Thanks for stopping by, and good luck with finding a cure for that. If you do find one, could you let me know? I live in a house with all boys and sometimes, they asphyxiate me with their heinous anuses. or would that be ani?

au bouquet de Tyne Daly

Yesterday afternoon, Fishdog and I had drinks with some good friends. You know how hard it is to find a couple you and your spouse love equally? Well, Chris and DeeDee are our perfect match.

Unfortunately, there is a problem with our friendship.

We get stupid together. Totally, unbelievably, ridiculously stupid.


Yesterday’s stupidity began with one of Chris’s favorite questions: “Which character am I gonna be in your book?”

I explain that I’m not sure but maybe I’ll make him a bad sheriff. Or the hot teacher.

Both options meet his approval. Then he asks, “Who’s gonna play me in the movie.”

That’s easy enough. “Timothy Dalton. You guys could be twins.” (it’s true. They look remarkably alike–of course, Chris is 20 years younger, so Timothy will have to have a good make-up artist, but it could work…)

Again, this meets Chris’s approval.

Then he asks me, “Are you gonna have a fart joke in your book? Cuz you know, flatulence can make or break a story.” (what is it with boys and fart jokes?)

So, at the same time that Chris is talking about farts, Fishdog is still casting the movie. When Chris says something about farting, Fishdog says Tim Daly should be cast as Chris’s character. I say something about “loving me some Tim Daly” and what does DeeDee hear?

“I love me some Tyne Daly farts.”

OMG. Stooooopid.

But it gets worse. We couldn’t let it go. Suddenly, we’ve cast Tyne Daly as Chris’s character and Chris says he doesn’t mind if Tyne plays his character in the movie as long as she farts. So for the rest of the afternoon, if Tyne Daly was mentioned, you had to make a fart noise. And now I’ve been commanded to write in a character that can be played by Tyne Daly and that character must have a flatulence problem. I don’t know how well a Farting Vampire will go over with YA girls, but I’m guessing I may be able to appeal to the teenage boy demographic if I write that character.

We were all crying from laughing so hard. I don’t know which is worse, the fact that we were sober when we created the Tyne Daly Fart Game or the fact that I’m really considering writing that character into the book.

This author has no knowledge of Tyne Daly’s actual flatulence issues or lack thereof. No offense to Tyne Daly intended…