totally obsessed with this

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My friend Kent posted this to his MySpace blog yesterday and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.

which way does the lady spin for you? Can you make her change directions?

The Right Brain vs Left Brain test … do you see the dancer turning clockwise or counter-clockwise? If clockwise, then you use more of the right side of the brain and vice versa.

Most of us would see the dancer turning counter-clockwise though you can try to focus and change the direction; see if you can do it.

At first, she was spinning counter-clockwise for me. But now, when I watch her, she’s always spinning clockwise. I can concentrate and make her change directions, but when I stop focusing, she goes right back to spinning clockwise. It’s freaking me out, man!

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe

RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
“big picture” oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can “get it” (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

friday night lights

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I’m supposed to be writing…but it ain’t happening tonight.

First of all, one of my CPs uploaded her book about demons and I can’t seem to stop reading it. Secondly, I’ve been awake since about 5 am (involuntarily awake) and I’m kinda tired. Thirdly, it’s very cool outside, therefore it’s perfect red wine weather. So I had a glass bottle. Fourthly, (is fourthly a word?) I guess it is. Fourthly, I’ve been in front of the computer (minus a few hours) since 5:30 am therefore I’m not quite all here.

Plus, there’s that whole “wine” issue.

Anyway, while I was notwriting tonight I flipped on the tv. One of my fave all time shows was on…Friday Night Lights. Hot high school hotties (redundant, I know. but hey, I’ve always liked ’em young) playing my 2nd favorite sport. Awesome. Then I realized Men in Trees was back(mmm mountain men)…directly across from Las Vegas (one of my other fave shows. Hey. It’s Josh Duahmel and he drives my fave car ever! a 69 Camaro SS. Sigh.). Such torture, having to choose. So I chose Men in Trees because back in Oxford, Las Vegas is being Tivo’d. 🙂 See, I’m not so stoopid.

Fishdog and the boys went to the Catholic High Homecoming game tonight. According to the phone calls, they had a great time. Sorry I wasn’t there…well, not really. I had wine. But in theory, I’m sorry I wasn’t there.

Peace y’all. Have a good weekend. I’ll post something fun tomorrow.

sex education by kids

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Last night, we were driving home from North Little Rock. Rader had a game at 5:00 (really, who schedules a game at 5:00? That’s ridiculous!) and he played a kick ass game but they lost by 3. Disappointing, to say the least. Anyway, after the game, we went to Rocky’s Pub to have dinner. Very tasty burgers and very cold beer on tap.

We had about a 30 minute drive to the house after dinner, which is always dangerous when the kids are feeling spunky. Apparently they were in a mood last night, having fun mouthing off and joking around and Rader decided it was time to ask questions about childbirth. He likes the fact that Ian was a C-section and that he wasn’t. So I retell the story.

Rader: You screamed when I was born. I remember it.
Me: Actually, I didn’t. I had great drugs.
Rader: I remember it, Mom. That’s why I had to get tubes. You screamed so loud my ears hurt.

Of course, I thought that was brilliant. Then he asked me: “Where did I come out of again? Your butt crack?”

Now, he knows the answer to this, but being a 9 yr. old, he of course thinks the word Vagina is the funniest thing ever. But I play along.

Me: You smell like you came from my butt crack, but no, you came from my vagina.
Rader: giggle VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA
Me: It’s not a bad word, Rader. You know that. It’s a body part. Like Penis or Eyeball.
Mark: Or elbow. Or sphincter.
Ian: I thought sphincter was an old lady without a husband.

Total silence. Then much laughter.

Mark: You mean spinster?
Ian: Huh huh huh. Yeah. That’s what I meant. I know what a sphincter is.

Name calling ensues. Each boy calls the other a sphincter. I finally put the kibosh on the body part conversation telling them I want a do over. I want to rewind 14 years and decide against having dirty, stinky, rotten boys.

Rader: That’s what happens when you put the hotdog in the donut.

OMG. I nearly ran off the road. That was the funniest thing ever. I have totally ruined my children. Much therapy will be necessary. But at least they’ll have plenty to talk about.

run ian run!

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My panic attack is well contained now. I wrote like the wind today, adding 13 new pages so far and will continue tonight after Rader’s soccer game.

Yesterday, Ian ran in his 3rd cross-country meet. They award the top twenty runners with ribbons and on his 1st meet, Ian came in 23rd. Close, but no cigar.

His 2nd meet, he kicked major ass, and came in 16th. Score a ribbon!

Yesterday, the track was a little longer and a little tougher. But not tough enough to keep that boy of mine out of the top 2o! He was 2oth and he walked away with another ribbon.

I’m very proud of my #1 boy. He’s never been a runner before. He’s now been running 3 days a week for about 6 weeks. He’s getting better and better. I hope he sticks it out.

Here’s a camera phone pic of my baby running toward the finish line.

mel-o-panic!

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I woke up this morning to a panic attack. My dream sent me into a total state of Oh Shit.

Apparently, in my dream, I was two weeks from my deadline and on page fifty of my book. (which, if I’d taken the time to wake up, I would’ve realized it was a dream because of the page number alone.) But I didn’t take the time to wake up. I had a stroke instead.

So, I got up at 5:30 (when my heart finally returned to its normal pace) made a pot of coffee (must get my heart rate back up with that caffeine injection, you know) and started writing.

I’ve written 5 pages so far. Thank God. I guess my subconscious was telling me that I’ve spent way too much time being the mom-taxi this week and not enough being the writer. Guess that’ll show me.

In other news, Fishdog finally posted a new blog. Pop in and tell him twfkam sent ya.

do you understand the words that are comin’ outta my mouf?

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When I say the words “Please, leave your brother alone. Don’t look at him, speak to him, flip him off, touch him, poke him, or kick him under the table. And please, no more silent “I’m gonna slit your throat” threats.”

Do y’all understand me? Or am I speaking a foreign language? An alien language?

Something must be wrong with me because apparently, my damn kids don’t understand anything I say.

Not. One. Damn. Thing.

Speaking of damn, I’m heading to the Big Dam Bridge to walk it off.

Hasta la vista.

ETA the video. Was running late this morning (due to aforementioned children of the corn) and didn’t have a chance to find…

it’s tuesday.

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Nothing has changed from yesterday. I didn’t get my pages written because we spent 4 hours house-hunting with a fabulous Realtor. We liked her tremendously and she showed us some great properties. And some not so great ones… Now, to sell our house so that we can purchase one of those (great) properties…

I’m having lunch with a friend of mine from High School. Here’s a piccie of us from our reunion.

Funny thing about Annetta, in 9th grade, we didn’t like each other because of a boy. What is with girls and their catfights over boys? Sometimes I wish we could have a little foresight in high school…it would save us sooooo much turmoil.

His name was Denton McDonald and he was my first real boyfriend in high school. Well, he was really my first real boyfriend ever. I’d had crushes before and I’d been kissed before, but I hadn’t really had a “serious” (like lasting more than a few weeks) boyfriend until my freshmen year. And Denton was it.

He was a bit of a country bad boy. He was the kinda lanky but muscular and at the time I thought he was hot. I mean HAWT.

He gave me my first hickey. Which is totally gross now, but looking back, I guess it was the best kind of branding. It said “She’s with me.” And I’ve always liked that alpha dog thing. Of course being with an Alpha male is hot, for about 10 seconds. Then it gets old. Fast.

Anyway, I got grounded for something (probably my smart mouth, go figure) and Denton couldn’t wait around for me, so he decided to go after Annetta. And of course, in typical teenage fashion, I blamed her. Hah. Girls are so stupid.

It all worked out in the end though. Denton and I remained friends after that year. (Hell, we had no choice, he always sat directly in front of me in class. McDonald/McKenzie) and Annetta and I moved on. (I have never figured out why some girls never move on. It’s HIGH SCHOOL for Chrissake! Move the fuck on!)

Heh, you know. I haven’t talked to Denton in years. Maybe he’ll google himself and find my blog and contact me. That would be a hoot.

I’m outty. Gotta hit the pavement for my 2 miles today before lunch.

big dam bridge

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Little Rock is the proud home to the world’s largest pedestrian bridge. It’s almost a mile long (4/5 of a mile to be exact). The bridge crosses the Arkansas River over Murray Lock and Dam and that is why it’s called the Big Dam Bridge. Which is the perfect pun because it is a big damn bridge.

The boys love asking me if I’ve been to the Big Dam Bridge because they think they’re getting away with cursing. Ian totally tried to nonchalantly blow it off and say “I know” when we pointed out it was “dam” and not “damn”.

Anyway, Pete and I walked the dam(n) bridge this morning. I jogged a little with him, probably about 1/3 of a mile. Not nearly enough, but since I haven’t been to the gym in 3 weeks, it was plenty. I walked the nearly 2 miles in 26 minutes. Not too bad. Not great either.

Writing wise, I plan to hit it for 5 pages today. Not a lot, but we have to take the car to the shop and do some other shit today. Maybe we’ll go look at a house or two and hope while we’re there our house in Oxford will sell.

Happy Monday y’all!

BTW: It’s not too late to donate to save the ta-tas! Jenna the sex kitten walked on Saturday. I’m still waiting to see how well she did. She’s 74% to her goal of raising $2600. Every little bit helps, so save a ta-ta and donate a buck or ten.

70 days of sweat

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I’m going to sweat it out with Sven for 70 days starting on 10/15. Doesn’t that sound sexy?

Any of you writers out there wanna join me?

Oh and I’m hitting the fitness trail again. I’ve been away from the gym for 3 weeks and I feel sluggish and yucky. I wonder if I can lose 70 lbs in the 70 days? Okay, probably not. But a girl can dream, right?