THIS. IS. AWESOME.
You’re Welcome.
Also hello to my 58 new followers that my last post brought to me! It’s good to know there are other people out there who appreciate and share my journey and struggles with finding my fitness happiness.
BTW, Turbo Fire? It is HARD and it Kicks Ass. I like it.
Happy Humpday, bitches!
Oh, and if you’re on instagram, follow Ottenheimer_Library. Please?
As in, let’s “ketchup”!
Ugh. that was horrible. And now I want fries.
First off, happy belated mother’s day to all the moms who don’t suck.
Check out my awesome Mother’s Day gift that my cool boys got for me.
They tried to find me the perfect flamingo they said, but this is perfect. Me gusta mucho.
Update on the spider bite:
Friday I woke with a super swollen and painful arm. Weird. But it’s probably because Walgreens sucks now that they’ve purchased all the USA Drugs and they never seem to be able fill a prescription timely anymore. Apparently they were out of my antibiotic and didn’t bother to tell me prior to texting me that my prescription was ready. So when we get there, they let us know it’ll be ready tomorrow. And it was…around 5:30 pm. Which allowed the toxin/infection another 24 hours to grow. And so, I was pitiful and whiny on Friday while I waited for the meds to kick in.
Saturday I was all better, so I cleaned up my yard.
OH…Why was I cleaning my yard? Because another Hammered McHammerstein decided to drive through a tree in my front yard. She was on Xanax, not booze. That didn’t stop her from getting arrested. Trust me. Here’s some pictures, and if you want real entertainment, watch the video at the end of my blog. Yes. She was followed and filmed. It’s kinda like my own personal episode of COPS.
So I sawed up the giant holly bush she mowed over, and Jefe finally got to the tree in the back yard that broke during the ice this winter. We did LOTS of sawing. And hauling. And I still need to get the left over car debris from the yard before I mow… yippee.
And Mother’s Day started with pancakes and ended with cheese dip with a lot of John Deere time in between. All with my boys… THESE ARE SOME OF MY FAVORITE THINGS!
Now, for your viewing pleasure…Hammered Driving:
This song will cheer you up on a rainy day like today. OMG it is soooo damn dreary. I can’t wait til tomorrow, where the weather is supposed to match my sunshiny disposition. Okay, here’s another song that always makes me happy. I love the original by The Foundations, but here’s another version that’s a lot of fun:
BUILD ME UP BUTTERCUP : McFly (feat. Busted)
And here’s the only BEST way to listen to a Justin Bieber song, it’s a NEON TREES Mash-up:
STAND BY ME and the Beib’s BABY.
If you’re feeling down today, these songs should perk you right up! I’m happy to report, I’m feeling good this week after eating healthy every day, exercising every day, and sleeping well. And I’m in a fantastic freaking mood and have been all week…despite the gloomy weather. Hurry up, Friday! I need your sunshine!!! Meanwhile…y’all keep your sexy goin’…and sparkle until the sunshine can’t resist your shine!
This video is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.
In other fun news, my favorite headline news statement this morning: “Honey Boo Boo beats the RNC.” HAH! *love*
And finally, our little itty bitty kitty has a name.
Introducing Little-Itty-Bitty also known as Libby. And boy is Ruby in love.
I’m off to see my BFF from high school. Sushi, shopping and shenanigans!
BlueBelle’s fan belt split apart yesterday on the way home from an epic weekend at the lake. So she took a ride.
This is just one more issue to add to her repertoire of late. El Jefe worked his butt off replacing her alternator last week. We’ve had to recharge and jump the battery multiple times, and now the fan belt.
I mean, I know she’s an old gal and these things happen, but do they all have to happen at once?
We had a blast at the weekend. Here’s a link to the photos. There was lots of shenanigans and mayhem.
I would like some of that peace and tranquility back. Also, I would really like for this head cold Jefe and I came home with to go away…
In other news, check this Chick out. This is a very funny and well-informed view of the Chick-fil-a hate message. You go Jackson Pearce. I agree with every word you said.
I heard this song yesterday and it really struck me. I dig it. Loads.
“Glass”
by Thompson Square
Trying to live and love,
With a heart that can’t be broken,
Is like trying to see the light with eyes that can’t be opened.
Yeah, we both carry baggage,
We picked up on our way, so if you love me do it gently,
And I will do the same.
We may shine, we may shatter,
We may be picking up the pieces here on after,
We are fragile, we are human,
We are shaped by the light we let through us,
We break fast, cause we are glass.
Cause we are glass.
I’ll let you look inside me, through the stains and through the cracks,
And in the darkness of this moment,
You see the good and bad.
But try not to judge me, ’cause we’ve walked down different paths,
But it brought us here together, so I won’t take that back.
We may shine, we may shatter,
We may be picking up the pieces here on after,
We are fragile, we are human,
We are shaped by the light we let through us,
We break fast, cause we are glass.
We might be oil and water, this could be a big mistake,
We might burn like gasoline and fire,
It’s a chance we’ll have to take.
We may shine, we may shatter,
We may be picking up the pieces here on after,
We are fragile, we are human,
And we are shaped by the light we let through us,
We break fast, cause we are glass.
We are glass.
I’m wearing my red sundress today because I can’t get this song out of my mind. I love it. I’m so ready for summer.
Lyrics | Kip Moore lyrics – Somethin Bout A Truck lyrics
I’ve been in a real country music mode lately. Not sure why. I think it’s because it makes me think of summers growing up and weeks of camping on the lake with my daddy. It’s about half-past time for me to be on the lake again…
I guess we can officially start singing the 12 Days of Christmas now.
AND A BEER IN A TREE.
Confession: I didn’t know a “toque” was a hat for the longest time. I thought they meant something else when they said 5 golden toques…
Rader P had his 2nd guitar lesson last night and Jag is impressed with how quickly he seems to be picking it up. So my little monkey is now practicing a few chords from BAD MOON RISING.
(there’s monkeys in the video, too. When I pick out a theme, I take it all the way!)
ION I found another four-leaf clover this morning when on the phone with Jenn C. (now with more monkeys)
Okay, well that’s all I have right now, unless you want to hear the story about how I nearly had a stroke while waiting to buy gas last night… Thankfully I was on the phone with Dee for the ENTIRE 40 MINUTES otherwise you would be reading about me in the paper. The headline would either be: Woman Strokes Out Waiting in Line or Woman Goes Mad and Kills All Stupid People at the Kroger Gas Station (FYI, that 2nd headline is probably the most accurate)
Sometimes I’m funny. This is a true story. I’m not even making it up. I can sometimes make people laugh.
And sometimes I only make myself laugh. But seriously, if I don’t make myself laugh, who will?
This morning, I made both boys laugh until my oldest asked me to stop because he was gonna have an accident and he wasn’t talking about pee.
I told him that would be a problem for me because my love stopped at teenage poop. There. I said it. I put a condition on my love for my children and that condition is poo.
This did not help the laughter situation at all, btw. But he managed to control his guts, which is good because I totally would have put him out of the car with $10 and said, “Good luck with that.” (ok, maybe a slight exaggeration as there is currently no cash in my wallet. Sorry kid.)
Anyway, I’m just glad I can crack my kids up. I figure this will go a long way in the future therapy that I will be paying for. At least they can laugh at how screwed up I made them.
I had another, almost perfect moment with my youngest this week. We were getting our geek on at the Science Fair. When it was over, we had to brave the bitter, 40 mph winds to the car which was almost 2 blocks away. In a burst of simultaneous awesome, we started singing TALK DIRTY TO ME by Poison (it had been on the radio earlier). So there I am, with my 13 year old son, racing across middle school campus belting out an 80s hairband classic. In the midst of this musical moment, a couple of girls passed us and yelled “Hey Rader’s Mom!” and I stopped singing long enough to yell “Hey strange girls I don’t know!” and then we continued on.
Yes, I am a very lucky momma. If there’s one thing I’ve ever done right in my life, it’s my awesome kids. Even if I have effed them up a bit…
Bitchin' Fiction: Musings by author Melissa McKenzie / Melissa Francis 