Yeah. I have nothing to explain the blog title. Sorry.

Last night I didn’t sleep for a damn. Like, 2 hours maybe? And when I was sleeping, I was having the weirdest dreams ever. Ugh. It’s never good when you’re dreaming about having migraine headaches and then you wake up with a headache. Thankfully, the real headache was not a migraine. 800 mg of ibuprofen later and I’m all better.

The good news is, even though I’m pretty sleepy today, I feel good. Mostly. I may have a slight attitude, but then, how is that different from any other day?

Just add more coffee.

Since I was sick last week, I haven’t seen my rotten kids much because this wasn’t my weekend with them. How is it possible that I actually almost, sorta missed them? I’m taking them to dinner tonight because Rader has soccer camp this week and it’s just easier for him to stay with his dad and Ian…well, he’s 18. I never know if he’s gonna grace my house with his presence or not. Thankfully, he calls/texts me constantly so I always know where he is. (well, that and the microchip I had imbedded in his skull). It’ll be good to hang with them today. When I asked where they wanted to eat, I knew the answer. Either US Pizza or Mexican. I think we’ve decided on US Pizza… hopefully it will be nice outside so we can eat on the deck.

Mmmmmm. Food. I’m hungry and sleepy.

Happy Monday, y’all. If you see me today and I’m walking around like a zombie, just bring me another cup of Joe. Thanks.

Do you know what you can buy for $4000?

Yesterday was just a crap day all around. (and no, it had nothing to do with the elections. I mean, I am quite convinced the weather was cold and crappy because the Deatheaters had taken over and were sucking the happiness out of the world, but that had absolutely nothing to do with my day or my mood.) It was just one of those days. And no matter how much I wanted it to get better, it just seemed to get worse.

But today, the sun is out, my mood is bright and life is full of sparkle again. (Sparkle is not the same as Bedazzled, just so you know.)

I sparkle on the inside, which shows on the outside…well, I usually do. Yesterday–not so much.

Anyway, today I’m all better thanks to a nice talk with El Jefe last night, a couple of yummy beers, some fun time hanging with my boys and a very good night’s sleep.

Speaking of the boys…here’s a snippet of conversation from last night:

Ian: $4000! Rader! Do you know what I could buy for 4 grand?

Rader: A hooker. No wait, for $4000 she’d be a call girl.

Me: *deafening silence with mouth hanging open*

Ah yes. I love being the mother of two very funny boys.

more drugs? better drugs?

So I really have nothing fun to say today other than the walker thing is getting closer to reality.

I’m seriously too damn young to be walking around like a MawMaw. Oh well, at least I still have my looks. Hahahahahaha

In other news, I’ll be in Oxford this weekend. Not sure if I’ll be walking around or cruising in a Hoveround, but I’ll be there. If I buzz by you at the speed of light, I’m sorry. It’ll be a new toy and I’ll just wanna go FASTER! Call me Ricky Bobby not MawMaw!

Dear Friday. Thank you for getting here. Love Melf.

Seriously. I’m so ready for this damn week to be over. And I apologize for all the kevetching I’ve done this week. It’s not like me, I know. Usually I’m all sunshine and butterflies (and sparkles, OH MY!) but I just haven’t had it in me all week long. I’m Mrs. CrabbyPants. Or Mrs. CrankyPants. Or Mrs. BitchyPants. Whatever. *grumblehissgrumblehiss*

I baked my first pie in my lovely gas oven last night. Baking is an art and usually I create beautifully baked art. And last night’s pie…looked beautiful. And it tasted wonderful. BUT the bottom crust didn’t cook all the way through and my apple filling was runnier than usual. It was an off night for the pie queen.

But I look really cute in an apron, don’t you think?

Okay, so next week will be better. I will do my best to take my bitchy britches off and burn them. I don’t like it when I feel cranky all the time. It’s just not natural to me! I like being fun, flirty, and full of sparkle. So you better put on your shades next week cuz I’m bringing sparkle back…

good morning girl…

Feeling a little grumpy today. Dunno why. Probably because I didn’t sleep well last night. I hate restless nights. UGH.

I decided to make a list of things that make me happy. In no particular order here we go:

  1. Rader’s sense of humor. The boy just makes me laugh.
  2. Ian’s smile. And the way his ears turn red when you ask him about his girlfriend.
  3. The smell of fresh brewed coffee
  4. Ruby kisses.
  5. Fresh honeysuckle or wisteria.
  6. I love the way new money feels and smells.
  7. And I love the way leather smells. (I guess I’m an olfactory girl.)
  8. These songs:
    1. Build Me Up Buttercup by The Foundations
    2. Judgment Day by Whitesnake
    3. Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry (Okay, really, that whole CD rocks my socks)
    4. Islands in a Stream by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers
    5. Into the Mystic by Van Morrison
    6. Stacy’s Mom by Fountains of Wayne
    7. It Had to Be You by Harry Connick, Jr.
    8. Good Morning Girl, by Journey (click here for the less than 2 minute song that should inspire gods)
  9. Good friends.
  10. A cold beer on a hot day.

Of course, this is list is not all-inclusive but I already feel better. What about you? What puts you in a good mood if you wake in a funk?

Also, don’t forget to head over to Fictionistas to read a super interview with uber authors PC Cast and Kristin Cast.