Tag Archives: football

tell me it’s true!

Posted on by
Reply


I love college football, particularly Razorback football. I will watch the NFL some but I don’t have a team I love or follow…I basically follow ex-Razorbacks. So I’ll watch the Cowboys for ♥Felix Jones♥, the Raiders (barf) for Darren McFadden (♥), occasionally the Broncos for Peyton Hillis and the Bears for the two Marcuses (Harrison and M♥nk). I watched the Saints for Boo Williams until he got hurt but my favorite Razorback of all time was Matt Jones–so I was a Jaguar fan because I LOVED watching him play.

Then he did something stupid, got arrested, was on thin ice with his team, did something stupid again, and got let go.

So last year, the NFL was without Matt Jones, and I missed him. Terribly.

But things might be changing soon. There are rumors floating around that both the Cincinnati Bengals and the Tennessee Titans are interested in Jones. He’d get more playing time with Cincy (and actually, he’d be playing with another Razorback who was drafted in 2009, Jonathon Luigs) and that’s probably where he’s gonna end up. I’d actually like to see him land with the Titans, but wherever he lands, I’ll be happy. BECAUSE HE’LL BE PLAYING AGAIN.

I love him and I’m sooooo ready to watch him play again. So Jones, don’t screw up this time, mmmkay?

whatever

Posted on by
Reply

It’s Monday. I’m tired. I spent the weekend deep cleaning and all I want to do now is curl up in a ball and sleep.

I blogged over at Fictionista’s today about McDonald’s being a bully. Check it out.

Saints beat Vikes last night. It was a helluva game.

Maybe I’ll have more to say tomorrow. Maybe not. Check back then to find out.

overpaid babies…

Posted on by
Reply

I love college football, but I don’t follow the NFL much because it seems the pros have lost their passion for the game. They play for the bucks now, and oftentimes, they’re just overpaid babies.

Case in point, yesterday, the Minnesota Vikings and the Dallas Cowboys played for a chance to move forward to the Super Bowl. Minnesota owned Dallas–it was 17 to 3 at half-time. Defensively, Dallas improved somewhat in the 3rd quarter, holding the Vikings scoreless, but early in the 4th, the Vikes pulled ahead 27-3.

After that, Dallas just seemed to give up. I don’t think they gained 20 yards in the next 8 plays! They started pouting and stopped playing.

Fast forward to about 2 mins left in the game. It’s 4th down and 3, and Favre throws a TD pass and one of the Cowboy players gets his panties all in a wad about it and runs over to the Viking bench and yells at Favre and the coaches for ‘running up the score.’

“I thought it was totally classless and disrespectful. This is the NFL, that’s not what this is about. I don’t think there’s a place for that … I was looking for [Vikings coach Brad] Childress. I didn’t think it was right, but they’ve got to see us next year.

Dude. Did you hear yourself? It’s the NFL, not pee wee football. If you don’t want them to run the score up…PLAY SOME FREAKING DEFENSE AND STOP THEM! Are you seriously whining? Aren’t you supposed to be a grown-ass man?

Oh wait. You’re an overpaid baby. Yup. This is exactly why I don’t follow the NFL. Hope you had some cheese with that whine…

10 things I learned at the Liberty Bowl

Posted on by
Reply

So the Arkansas Razorbacks played in the Liberty Bowl this weekend and I was one of the 62,000 fools who attended.

It was farking cold.

Here are a list of things I learned from our trip this weekend:

  1. Bud Light with Lime tastes like Kool-Aid.
  2. If you drink a few Bud Light with Limes while traveling to Memphis, you will have to stop to pee 5 times.
  3. There are NOT ENOUGH LAYERS IN THE WORLD to keep you warm when the wind chill is -100.
  4. You will stop partaking in adult beverages after you use the port-o-potty.
  5. If you’re walking to the port-o-potties and every person along the way warns you away from potty #3–you listen.
  6. It’s okay to leave the game early.
  7. Sometimes GPS systems are stupid.
  8. Nothing brings white boys to the dance floor faster than Vanilla Ice.
  9. Guys today think that “dancing” is the same as “leg humping.”
  10. McDonald’s for breakfast tastes really, really, really good after freezing at a football game and being leg humped on Beale Street.

We had a great time. The Hogs won (finally) and it only took me two days to thaw out. Now we have snow here in little Rock…school didn’t start back today. But I still have to go to work. How uncool is that?

brrrrr

Posted on by
Reply

I’ll be at the Liberty Bowl today and taking Memphis hostage tonight. It’s gonna be c-c-c-c-c-c-c-cold! The high is only 34 degrees, so Ima gonna be bundling up with lotsa layers and a blanket. I may be a fool for sitting outside watching foozball in dis here weather, but I ain’t stupid.

GO HOGS!

Woo Pig Sooie!

and one last time: Shirley Q Liquor’s Razorback Fight Song

what makes a great weekend…

Posted on by
Reply

Me and the #1 child (in birth order not preference) hanging all weekend, watching movies, football, and then going to see a friend play an acoustic show at a local dive where we also ate the best burger known to man. It’s true. Best. Burger. Ever.

Movies we watched:
The Day the Earth Stood Still: I’m a Keanu fan but I didn’t really think I would like this movie. I was pleasantly surprised.

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: It is so good to know that my 15 year old son truly appreciates the Griswalds as much as his momma does. We laughed so hard and spent the day quoting the movie.

Sixteen Candles: We love us some Farmer Ted. And Long Duck Dong. AUTOMOBIIIIIILE?

Obsessed: I love me some crazy bitches.

The Ugly Truth: There was a lot of funny to this movie and we laughed out loud quite often…BUT…can I just say the ending scene was the biggest, most ridiculous joke on the face of this earth? Seriously. Not even necessary. It irritated me so much that it almost ruined the rest of the movie for me. Good thing I have a very active imagination and had no problem rewriting the ending in my head…which was much more satisfying. And funny.

#1 child (in birth order not preference) and I also decorated. He put the tree together and helped me string lights outside. He also cleaned his bathroom for me like a good boy. And he did his homework. Maybe this week he can be my #1 child in preference, too.

I also baked some peppermint mocha brownies, hoping they would light up some holiday spirit in my cold, black heart. They were so tasty and smelled so good, I did feel a momentary flicker…

Oh, and the Florida Gators lost. Which means Karma has a sense of humor.

Did you have fun this weekend? Do tell…

a night to remember

Posted on by
Reply

It’s not often that I’m able to go out and play with my friend ALL-CAPS KRISTAL but when I do, it’s always a night to remember.

And it also takes me about 2 weeks to recover. I may not have one foot in the grave, but I’m also not a spring chicken anymore. LOL

I knew the night was going to be a good one when I tried on a pair of jeans in a smaller size and they fit. I did it more as a way to gauge how much I needed to lose before I could wear them. I had no idea they would actually fit! So I bought them. And I will probably never take them off. That’s the only way to ensure I won’t gain any weight. LOL

So ALL-CAPS KRISTAL and my friend Kim picked me up and we headed to see The Gettys play. (awesome band! if you ever get a chance to catch their show, I highly recommend it) I spent much of the time admiring the lead singer’s ass, and before I knew it, ALL-CAPS KRISTAL had him standing next to me asking him if I could touch his booty. (Jaeger may or may not have been used as a bargaining chip) The girl has no fear.

Then we played with a little bachelor party. All the boys were 21 or so and we spent a lot of time trying to tell them it was okay not to get married so young. And we offered them other life advice which is not really something that needs to be written down here. ALL-CAPS KRISTAL kept introducing herself as “the famous local author Melissa Francis. Buy my book, BITE ME!”

The rest of the night will remain in the vault, but I will give you a few hints. Gay bar, inappropriate conversations, an offer that was hard to refuse, Midtown, IHOP, 4 A.M. (oh, and there was possibly some public indecency near the train station, but I will not confirm or deny the incident)

Yesterday I slept. And ate. And watched movies and football (HOLY COW! DID YOU SEE THE COLTS GAME!?) Tonight, I’m headed to the Rivermarket for Monday night football and then the rest of the week, I’m planning to chill. Gotta recharge my batteries for the next time ACK (heh) and Kim decide to take me out.

Hi, I’m Cliché. It’s nice to meet you…

Posted on by
Reply

Costumes, yummy food, friends, football, and a book signing.

If you threw in a beach and maybe a game of darts, this would be the most perfect weekend ever.

Tonight I have a costume party to go to. I was originally gonna be She-Hulk, but plans have changed…Yes, we’re having a ‘super hero’ themed party…and yes, She-Hulk (or ‘Slutty She-Hulk’ as I was planning to be) would’ve been a lot of fun…but I may not want to have green hair all night. So I’ve revamped.

Now I’m going as Cliché, The Naughty School Girl. But wait! you say. I thought this was a super hero party? you say.

Ah yes. It is. I’m the super hero of fantasies. Heh. And since I seem to pull off the Naughty Librarian look on a dialy basis, I decided to mix it up a little.

Yes, I’ll probably post pictures.

Probably.

I’m also making Artichoke-Me dip for my appetizer contribution. It’s a very simple and yummy recipe and I really can’t wait to pull it out of the oven so I can have a bite. (or 12)

Tomorrow is the Razorback game. They play Ole Miss (which is where our former coach defected to a couple of years ago. *boo hiss*) I feel certain we’re gonna tap the keg of whoop-ass on them. If we don’t, I’m also sure my Rebel pals will let me hear all about it. Wish I was going to be there…but…

I have a book signing tomorrow! Remember? There are 6 awesome authors gathering at the Books-a-million in NLR, AR from 5-8 pm Saturday night! You won’t wanna miss it…I’m thinking with that much talent all in one place, there might be a shift in the time-space continuum.

Y’all have a great weekend. I’ll see you Monday!

fever, football, ceiling fans, and Polanski

Posted on by
Reply

I’m at home with a feverish kid today. Have my fingers crossed it’s just a fever bug and not the *whispers* flu. He seems to be okay right now, so maybe it’s just a 24 hour thing…though it did start yesterday when he had a headache that was making him cry.

Sigh.

Don’t you hate it when your babies are sick?

I cleaned off my desk yesterday, my friend Chris came over and installed a ceiling fan for me and I actually got the living room and dining room cleaned.

I also made some damn good chili and watched a lot of football. I love a good rainy Sunday.

Oh, and I caught up on some dvr’d shows. Am I the only one who thinks this season of Hell’s Kitchen sucks? I mean, there’s one dude I like, but none of them seem to be very good chefs and we’re down to the final four? WTF? Also, I was sad Louise got the boot in Project Runway…I liked her.

Today I blogged at Fictionistas about this Roman Polanski bullshit…and I started a list of real people who deserve our admiration. Pop over and add to the discussion.

Did you have a productive weekend? Tell me all about it.