to scale or not to scale, that is the question.

I have decided NOT to scale anymore.

Fuck you, scales. You’re a Liar McLiarpants and I don’t like liars.

tumblr_m7oay3FSlX1rn13nao1_500Seriously? I know muscle weighs more than fat. I know I’m muscular and tend to develop quickly when working out…which is why I’m using low weights/high reps. Not that I’m afraid of bulking up…I’m not. I WANT to build muscle. I need to increase my metabolism and I know I am because I’m waking up starving to death in the mornings.

But my scales are an asshole. Complete and total asshole.

So I’ve decided to stop weighing. Because it does nothing but depress me. Especially since I’ve spent the last 3 weeks doing nothing but journaling my food/calories and working out like a boss and eating and drinking right…and then I weigh and it tells me I’ve gained 4 more pounds.

Go home scales, you’re drunk.

Do you know how hard not weighing is going to be for me?

scale-photoI know that weighing goes back to my dreaded high school years when I kept being “put” on a diet. You know, because being 5’6 with hips and weighing 140 lbs was considered fat in the 80s. They weren’t big fans of the Big Butt, So What school of thought back then.

Anyway, I was expected to weigh in at least once a week. Unfortunately, I start getting weirdly competitive with myself and start weighing daily…I tell myself it’s to keep track of my progress, so I can catch myself gaining again. The problem with that is, I start to obsess. And then I get pissed off when I KNOW I’m doing everything right and the scale refuses to acknowledge my hard work.

I’m going to hide them. Actually, I’m going to give them to El Jefe and tell him to hide them. Somewhere I’ll never look. Probably a good spot would be where we store the dusting supplies, since I never dust.

Fuck you, Scales. I’m so over you. We’re breaking up. I hear Taylor Swift may be looking for a new relationship. If you’re lucky, maybe she’ll write a song about you.

And to end on a happy note, here’s the gratuitous cat picture of the day. Big Baby: He’s such a big baby.

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things that make me…

Sad:

George Jones died today.

This song still makes me tear up. RIP George. If there’s a heaven, I hope you’re partying your ass off like the rock star you are! (and like you used to do…without remorse!)

THIS is being taught as SCIENCE.

It’s okay to believe what you choose to believe, but you should not teach your personal beliefs as scientific FACT when there is actual SCIENTIFIC PROOF that you are wrong is just plain ignorant. UGH. I fear for the future of these kids who are being taught this as science.

Things that make me HAPPY:

A CAT. IN A SHARK SUIT. RIDING A ROOMBA. CHASING A DUCK. It just doesn’t get more awesome than that.

Well, THIS might be more awesome. But only slightly.

Things that make me AWESOME:

Sassy pants. Sparkle. Humility. (LMAO) and a bag of Gardetto’s for Breakfast. (Hey, I almost chose the Chili Cheese Fritos. I think I made the better choice.)

I need a beach. Until I have this in real life, I’ll have to stick to imagining this is me and Jefe on our private island somewhere.

Thursday Night Lights

#66 (aka Rader P. Francis) for the Catholic High freshman football team texted me from the bus yesterday as they were headed to their ballgame:

#66: Be expecting a 40-50 yarder today. I’m in the zone, judging from the reps I was getting before we left.

Me: Awesome. U better not let me down

#66: I certainly don’t plan on it…

Fastforward to the game. 4 punts. Two decent 30+ yarders. One maybe 20 yards long and 50 yards high…. and then…this one:

42 yards of nothing but beauty. (video courtesy of Fishdog)

Here are the texts on the way home: 

#66: Well that sucked…Except for my 3rd punt! [actually his 4th but that’s ok] That was freakin’ awesome!!!!!

Me: Amazing!!!!!!

#66 ikr!!! You should TOoOoOtally blog aboot it.!

Me: 😉 I will

#66: Huzzah! The prophecy has been fullfilled!

Then it ended with the various proud of you, love you, love you too, see ya tomorrow stuff.

Yep. My baby. He’s got a foot on him!

And speaking of babies…Check out Little-Itty-Bitty in her favorite person’s arms. (hint, not mine…my arms aren’t hairy….)

Sorry if the sweetness gave you a cavity.

Happy Friday y’all! Today is awesome, and I have declared it the official Love on a Redhead day.

and don’t forget to sparkle!

burn baby burn and other stuff

It’s Tuesday. It feels like Monday. Probably because I spent the entire weekend working my ass off. Or at least Sunday & Monday I did…

We’ve been under a burn ban since May, so when Isaac rolled through last week, the ban was officially lifted and I officially got busy.

 Sunday afternoon, I stopped by my friend Lori’s house for some lasagna and Bellinis. Yum. And for a little reminiscing… She apparently just put together some old photo albums from our college years and thereafter…. Check out this beauty.

I believe this was the luau we had at our friend Dave’s house. This was actually between babies…I’m pretty sure summer of 96 or 97.  Beautiful, huh? hahahaha

Little-Itty-Bitty is doing well. She’s eating like nobody’s business and starting to do some exploring and playing. She seems to be getting some energy now that she’s fattening up. She is definitely a snuggly Kitty and she adores Jefe.

Hope y’all had a great holiday weekend. I’m exhausted still from all the burnin’ and cooking I did. (I made potato cakes and bacon for breakfast yesterday. Quiche for dinner. (I also did a Quiche on Sunday for some friends and on Saturday, made chili-cheese dip, bacon-ranch crazy bread for the Razorback watch party!) Woo Pig Sooie! It’s time for some football again!

pinterest SUCCESS

I tried my first Pinterest recipe last night…and boy was it YUMMY!

We had homemade Mac and Cheese, bacon-wrapped Talapia, and stuffed crab shells. OMG. So freaking good. (FYI, the stuffed crab shells were from the seafood deli in Kroger. On sale for $1.00 each with Kroger card. It was a damn good deal and mighty tasty.) It was the only thing on our plate that I didn’t fix last night. Now Jefe knows why I love watching cooking shows like Top Chef so much. I get ideas and then I CREATE! Cooking…it’s food science!

I can’t wait to get home and eat some more Mac and Cheese. And now that I’ve made the recipe once, I have some ideas on how to tweak it. I used only Half and Half in the recipe and I think I needed to mix it up with milk. It’s very rich…and would be fantastic with lobster, scallops or crabmeat (or all of the above). Next time I’ll probably leave out the Dijon mustard. I didn’t use much, but it was still a pretty strong flavor.

Have you seen PinterestFail.com yet? I love that blog. “Where good intentions go to die.” HAH!

In Itty Bitty Kitteh news…she still has no name…but she is settling in quite nicely.

Ruby is apparently still circling her. Jefe says she’s like a little annoying black shark. I guess new kitty smell is addictive…

introducing

A kitteh with no name…

and the newest member of the family at Compound de MelJefe…

Now to think of a name. She’s so itty bitty and scrawny I keep thinking EAT A SANDWICH or possibly CATe Moss. haha She was the runt of her litter and has spent the last two weeks at the vet trying to gain a little weight.

Ruby is very excited about having another cat. The cat, however, does not share in Ruby’s joy just yet. Trin-Trin is very curious but cautious. I think Clementine thought she was a squirrel and licked her lips…

Maybe we should just name her Squirrel.

pussycat, pussycat, I’ve got flowers

Yesterday was my Mom’s birthday, so El Jefe bought her some flowers…and while he was there, he got me some, too! Just because. As it should be.

 After I took the picture, I had to play with my favorite photo apps because I have a sickness.

And speaking of pussycats…Clementine decided to sleep in the bed last night. That doesn’t happen often, as she’s usually on the hunt to kill things in the night.

Happy Friday y’all. It’s a beautiful day here, even if it’s hot as the 7th cave of Hell. (or so I’ve heard, I haven’t visited that cave, yet.)

Oh, and now that I’ve got some Tom Jones stuck in your head, feel free to toss your panties on the stage of life today.

oh it’s a good friday indeed.

Bobcat Greyskull loves this azalea bush because of the butterflies. He’s the master of butterfly attacks and I try to be their protector, but sadly, he still manages to get one or two.

Clementine is hard core. Butterflies are for babies. She laughs at them. Yesterday, apparently she brought El Jefe a cardinal. I saw a giant crow in the field today and wondered where Clementine was hiding. I know she was plotting its demise.

So this is apparently Easter weekend. Happy Easter to those of you who celebrate. What this means for me? Mom’s baked ham. Mmmmmm.

Today is pedi day! I’m so excited because my disco toes now look like they’ve been used up in a back alley and left for dead.

In other news…my flower bed is sprouting! I planted Zinnias, Sweet William, Cosmos, Daisies (duh), Cornflower, and Foxglove. My house should be full of fresh cut flowers this summer. YAY!

So happy happy weekend to all my peeps. <–hurr (see what I did there? Easter? Peeps? Hurr Hurr!) I’ll see you Monday!

hello kitteh

The gray blur is Bobcat Greyskull. He is what crazy wishes it could be. Clementine plays with him, but when she’s done, she goes to the door and glares at me until I let her outside.

That’s when we get to see this…
He wants outside so BADLY. But we can’t do it. First off, he’s young, dumb and full of…well, yeah. He hasn’t been fixed. And he really isn’t smart. So we’d probably never see him again, except in pancake form in the middle of the road.