Because I’m one funny bitch.
The Bachelor, Episode 7 The one where Sean goes on a date with 50 Shades of Cray.
Today is hair day!
Tomorrow is VD!
Friday is FRIDAY!
This week is looking so bright, I gotta wear shades.
Go Forth and Read
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Tag Archives: The Bachelor
happy pancake day, my ass.
Dammit, how can you have a happy pancake day when you’re serious about your training. I’m working hard and I can’t be distracted by the flapjack of goodness right now!
LOL Who am I kidding. I freaking love pancakes and I may make my very tasty super secret recipe pancakes tonight. If I make them silver dollar size, then they can be a dessert. And I’ll save the batter and make the boys pancakes for breakfast tomorrow….Mmmmmmm. My mouth just watered.
In other news, last night was my successful return to BootyCamp. My elbow is still hurting and I had to modify some of the exercises to work around the injury, but overall, it felt great. I’ve promoted myself from Beginner BootyCamp to Regular BootyCamp. It was definitely a harder workout, but I enjoyed it (as much as one can enjoy such things.)
This morning didn’t feel so great and I didn’t sleep well last night. I’m sure it was all those endorphins swimming around in my body. When I did sleep, my dreams were awesome….
Stairs have been a challenge today…heh.
I’ll be hitting the gym at lunch to work out the kinks and soreness. See what a good girl I am? I deserve my pancakes…
Hope you guys have a happy Tuesday. I’ll have my Bachelor Recap posted at HDJM today…you’ll wanna check that out if you’re into milking goats in Montana….
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Workout Wednesday…
My days of Wine Wednesdays are gone for now. Do I miss them? Well, sure! I miss hanging with my girls on Wednesdays the most…however, I’m really enjoying my workouts, too. And I love the way my body is responding to regaining its fitness.
Yesterday, I added five 30 second sprints throughout my 30 minute run. I read that adding sprints to your runs will actually help you burn an additional 200 calories. It also increases your endurance without increasing your workout time. Since I’m working 7 days a week and it’s still getting dark too early, I can’t do my once-a-week long endurance walk/run. So I have to try to increase my endurance in the shortest amount of time possible.
I’m super-stoked about doing the 1/2 Marathon again.
I was a little disappointed to discover that recording my abdominal workouts on myfitnesspal.com doesn’t actually give me credit for additional calories burned. Hmph. I think if I do 200+ crunches a night, I’m burning some damn calories.
OH! And I think my elbow is healed enough that I can start BootyCamp again! I’m graduating myself from Beginner BootyCamp to Big Girl BootyCamp! I’m stoked. I just have to use light weights in the beginning so as not to re-injure my arm.
This weekend, we finally got a chance to start moving the storm debris down to the burn pile. Them was some heavy branches, let me just tell ya. We tried to move the branches in the front yard with the tractor, but they wouldn’t budge. Next up…a chainsaw.
This tree in the backyard is probably going to have to be completely removed. Sigh. It was such a pretty tree…
What’s going on in your world? Any fun news? Anyone really that concerned that Beyonce lip-synced at the Inauguration? no? Me either. This is NOT news, people, nor is it important.
Oh yeah: My Bachelor Recap is up at Hey Don’t Judge Me.…Go read the crazy and fill your eyes with Shirtless Sean…
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It’s that time again!
So while everyone was wasting their time, watching the Alabama game…(seriously, did anyone think that Notre Dame even stood a chance?) I was watching The Bachelor. And my recap is posted for your reading pleasure.
(BTW, I did not root for Alabama. I don’t like them and I can’T root for them just because they’re SEC. I also don’t like Notre Dame, so I didn’t root for anyone. Well, that’s not true. I sorta rooted for a meteor to fall from the sky and land on the stadium…)
Looks like this season of Bachelor is going to be full of more insecure crazy bitches. It’s like they’ve never watched the show before. Where do they find these women?
I’m sorry girls, but being insecure isn’t sexy. Sure, we all have those moments, but when you’re threatened by another woman because they got the first rose, or they got a hug, or they have a nicer rack than you, then all you’re doing is making yourself look sad. ON NATIONAL TV. And your snide, petty, catty remarks, even under your breath, show who you really are…and now we all know.
Of course, it would make for boring TV if they didn’t have the crazies…and let’s face it, real life is full of crazies, too…so I suppose they fit on “Reality TV”.
I went to the gym yesterday. I felt great when finished. I’m heading at lunch again today. I am happy to report that 5 weeks off of bootycamp did not hurt me too badly.
You know, I never worry that much about my weight. Sure, I wanna lose weight so I can be healthier, but I don’t worry about my size. Sexy is a state of mind. It’s an attitude. And honey, I’m a force to be reckoned with! Yesterday, I was heading back to my office from the gym and a man stopped me to tell me that he always loves seeing me on campus. He said “Your hair catches my eye, but your beautiful smile is what I enjoy seeing the most.” And then he called me lovely. AND I WAS IN GYM CLOTHES AND SWEATING.
Trust me. I didn’t stop smiling all day after that. Feeling good about yourself is always good, but hearing it…especially from an unexpected source like that, is the bombdiggity.
Smile! It keeps you young and makes you feel beautiful!
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[insert witty title of your choice]
Gonna take care of some business on the front end… You know I write the recaps for The Bachelor/Bachelorette over at Hey Don’t Judge Me right? Well, I have some very good news…Starting in July, I’ll be recapping Season 1 of Once Upon a Time…2 shows a week to bring us to the beginning of Season 2 in September! So…Please bookmark Hey Don’t Judge Me and like our Facebook page. We have some fantastic writers over there who recap and review all sorts of shows and movies and what not. For example, we added Dr. Who this week. I KNOW RIGHT? Awesome.
Oh. and now I have a Tumblr account because Stoney told me to get one. And I always do what I’m told. So I’ll be posting little what nots about the shows I’m recapping there. And other what nots. There will probably be posts about wine. And possibly some talk about the zombie apocalypse. I might even solve the world’s problems. So if you’re into that sorta thing, follow me. If not, well, why are you reading my blog anyway?
In news of discovery, I have been totally using El Jefe’s razor, and I am now going to have to go get my own, because WOW. This thing works! My legs are awesome. AND now they are smoov too!
Seriously. The battery power makes all the difference.
Hmmm. What else is going on? Today is the longest day of the year…and I’m stuck at work instead of soaking up all the sunshine at the lake. I think this should be a mandatory day off…don’t you?
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Month of Mel 2012: Day 13
Hah. Get your minds out of the gutter folks…
So my momma called me yesterday asking me what I wanted for my birthday. I told her nothing, which is absolutely true. My mom has done so much for me over these past few years especially, and that is gift enough. Then at work, I had several folks ask me what gift I asked for…and I realized, I don’t really think it’s a gift if you have to ask for it.
When I posted about the history of the Month of Mel, I talked about I almost always planned my own birthdays…all the way down to the gift–if there even was a gift at all. (in my adult life…my mother rocked the birthday world growing up.) I’ve never once been surprised for my birthday. (I think this is one reason I love giving gifts so much.It gives me great joy to see the appreciation of a truly well-thought out, meaningful gift.) So if I ever really did want something for my birthday–it would be to be surprised. To have someone pick out something just for me, to care enough to make me feel special for one day. I want my gifts to be personal and given with love. I want to feel like I don’t have to celebrate an entire month to make up for feeling overlooked and taken for granted for so many years. Also, jewelry. Every girl wants jewelry.
And that’s something I would never ask for; but it is something I can always hope for. /semi-serious Month of Mel post.
In other news, IT’S TUESDAY BITCHES. Who needs some sparkle because I have plenty to spare! Also, I found my 3rd & 4th four-leaf clovers of 2012 yesterday. I’m feeling lucky…
OH…and The Bachelor: The Final Rose recap is live. After the Final Rose will be up later… is up now!
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Month of Mel 2012: Days 6 & 7
Sorry about missing yesterday. I got up late, was busy at work, and by the time I got home, I just didn’t feel like blogging.
However, my Bachelor The Women Tell All recap did get posted yesterday…You should click the link and go read it. And you should retweet it and forward it on and like it on facebook and do whatever you can to help a sista out. Actually, I think you should go read all my Bachelor recaps because I’m funny. Also we’re having a contest and the more people who go to Hey Don’t Judge Me from my posted links, the better chance I have at winning $100. I’m not gonna lie. I want to win.
BTW, we’ve added two knew shows…my Canuck friends should be very happy we’ve added BOMB GIRLS! and we’ve also added White Chapel.
The girls got a little stabby with each other on Women Tell All. I really wanted to see some real blood or at least some Jell-o Wrestlin’…sadly, it was just their words that cut like a knife.
ION, mine and Bell Bottoms’ Studio 54 themed Housewarming/Birthday Bash is getting closer. Last night I purchased some Gold and Silver door fringe as well as a bubble machine. I may or may not have also added these to my outfit of awesome:
Now, if I can just make sure my hair does what it’s supposed to do. Note to self: Buy lots of Rave #4.
El Jefe is going to have an amazing mustache. AMAZING. Now we just need to find him some gold chains…
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that just happened.
See how cute I am in my exercise gear? Even at 5:15 a.m. Yes, that’s before the sun, y’all. Before. The. Sun.
Reluctantly, I got out of bed, but by the end of my 45 minute walk, I felt great. I added some lunges and a few (okay, a lot) of booty shaking into the mix and it was pretty awesome. (I’m so very glad it was Before. The. Sun. so nobody could witness said booty shaking.)
Anyway, yay me! Maybe next time I’ll take Ruby.
BTW: Objects in blog and in Melf’s imagination may appear slightly different in reality…
In other fun news, woo boy my Bachelor recap is up. We have metaphors and euphemisms for days, folks! Go forth and read.
Bachelor Ben Episode 8: The Final Four showdown begins…
In other, other fun news, Hey Don’t Judge Me was voted Weblog of the Month. Awesome, huh?
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The Prodigal Blogger Returns
Yeah, I missed you too, but not enough to pull out my computer and let you know. Sorry about that. It’s been a very hectic 10 days and I’ve been exhausted. I was on some awesome pain meds for a few days that probably would have made for some fantastic blogs, but luckily for me, they also made me too tired to try. So I’ve been spared the humiliation of Drugged Blogging and sadly, you’ve been denied the awesome it could have been. Maybe next time.
I did finally get The Bachelor Episode 6 (last week’s episode) recap up Monday and Episode 7 was posted last night, so if you haven’t already, please go read the crazy.
What’s been going on? Well mostly sleeping. I did get out for a margarita last Thursday which was fun, I went Disco Diva Shopping with Robyn for an exclusive (are you on the list?) Studio 54 event coming up in March, it snowed for about 2 hours on Monday and was really pretty until it turned to rain, Rader took the entrance exam at Catholic High, we went to see Safe House which was action packed and awesome, but sadly Ryan Reynolds wore a shirt, and El Jefe and I enjoyed a lovely steak dinner for Valentine’s day. Look at my pretty roses and orchid:
I’m settling back into a groove, and I hope to get back to more regular blogging…because we have the Month of Mel coming up in just two weeks! Are y’all ready?
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updates of the this and that variety
Hey Don’t Judge Me business:
- My Bachelor Recap is live (or as I like to call it, How to Be a Proper Ho)
- Stoney’s Glee, Hoarders, and Real Housewives of Beverly Hills recaps are up (SouthLAnd to come later today)
- Other recaps you should be reading: Merlin, Spartacus, Top Chef; Texas and many, many more!
- If you are checking out Hey Don’t Judge Me and reading the content, please take a moment to “Like” us or Google 1+ us, etc. It helps.
- And finally, we are now offering advertising on the site. My friend Maria Geraci just purchased an ad (for her upcoming 4th novel A Girl Like You), and you can, too! (not for her book, obviously, though that is very nice of you to offer) We have very cheap introductory rates for the next two months, so if you want in on advertising to 600K hits a month….contact Laura at heydontjudgeme[at]gmail[dot]com.
Life:
- Things and stuff are a happening this week, so I’ll probably not be around much
- Head to Toe by Lisa, Lisa and Cult Jam came on the radio this morning and I’ve been dancing like a white girl ever since.
- I suddenly want to wear blue eye shadow and tease my bangs. Has anyone seen my Spuds MacKenzie shirt?
- If you ever really want a single Margarita, but don’t feel like making it yourself or sitting in a restaurant…(aka, getting out of your stretchy pants) I highly recommend the Daily’s Frozen Pouches. Both Pomegranate and Lime are tasty. If you prefer on the rocks style, then you can’t go wrong with Mike’s.
- Today is Wednesday which is my longest day of the week. But it should be a good one, and that makes me happy.
- The daffodils are confused because it has been such a warm January. They are popping up all over the place and the Crocus have even started to bloom. They want it to be spring already. So do I…
Bitchin' Fiction: Musings by author Melissa McKenzie / Melissa Francis 