Not sure how you’re gonna wrap this gift up for me…
Seriously? I mean, I get it. Dudes need to check themselves before they wreck themselves but come on…this is the worst Valentine’s Day gift idea/campaign ever.
So, El Jefe, just in case I wasn’t clear… This is a definite NO on your list of ideas for V-day.
Mmmmmmkay? ❤
OMG. I’m so damn ready for some sun! How do people live in areas where they have no sunlight at all for extended periods of time? I’m going out-of-my-mind crazy! I just wanna crawl under the covers and stay there. It’s not right and I don’t like it one bit.
This is my least favorite time of year. I abhor January and most of February. It’s mostly gray and cold and there’s lots of fog and discontent. (Or did I just describe myself?) All I can think about lately is warm weather, trips to the lake or the pool, walking by the river and getting burned by the sun not by the wind, and just being generally content.
This is why I’m a warm weather girl. This is why I belong in a state like Florida. I belong where there is water and warmth almost all the time. I belong on a beach. I am THAT girl and I’m totally good with that.
We’re headed to Atlanta for a baby shower this weekend and I checked the forecast so I could pack properly and what do I discover? Lows in the low 20s, highs only around 40. Dammit. So I’m gonna be doing a lot of mental vacationing while I’m gone…and this is where I’ll be:
I promised Birdrunner yesterday that I would stop referring to our exercising as DEATH MARCHES (even though they totally are). From this point forward our death marches daily jaunts will be referred to as HAPPY-FUN-TIME WALKS. This picture is me, being happy about my happy-fun-time exercising. I’m totally stoked, can’t you see? (and man, do I rock those short shorts and strapless cone bra. I’m not sayin’…I’m just sayin’) I also do my happy-fun-time exercising in red stilletos, just for the challenge. I hear it does wonders for your calves…
Yesterday’s happy-fun-time walk consisted of 4 miles in under an hour. Not bad for this ol’ gal who hasn’t been anywhere near a walk in almost a month. My stroll tends to be a 15 minute mile, so anything under that I’m happy with. I’m hoping for the half marathon I can finish under 3.5 hours, but I’ll be happy with finishing. This is my first rodeo and I’m not fooling or pushing myself. I just wanna finish and then next year, maybe finish with a better time.
Last night, I almost ruined the effects of my happy-fun-time walk with a super gigantic larger than normal bowl of Mac and Cheese. But I pulled out my medicine ball and did crunches. I’m pretty sure that helped. Or at least I’m gonna pretend it did.
In other news, I’m also pretty sure the Mac and Cheese is responsible for making me dream about sock monkeys all night. It was a little weird in dreamville, let me tell you… Kinda Sock Monkeys meet Willie Wonka meet Danny Elfman…
So I posted a pic of my hot new boots on FB yesterday, but I had to repost here because I’m still in love with them a lot.
Guess what? The sock monkey hat really compliments the boots. SASSY!
I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately, trying to figure my way out of it and not sure how to do it (except for shoe shopping…but then that sends my bank account into a funk.) I mean, I do the smiling, laughing, faking my way through the day crap and mostly I feel good but still the funk just hovers like a gray cloud. Not really a storm cloud, but it certainly isn’t full of sunshine and unicorns either.
And I realized last night that some of this is holiday hangover. It took a lot out of me this year. I had daydreamed all year long that somehow, some way this holiday season would be better than my last five or so, and even though it was in a lot of ways, it still wasn’t what I needed. (which is all my fault because I didn’t make it what I needed. I just allowed myself to survive. And frankly, that’s probably where some of this comes from. I don’t do well with just existing. I like to be an active participant…) So I’m still kinda recovering from that funktastic feeling.
Also, I haven’t exercised in 3 weeks, and trust me, that has a lot to do with my trip to Funky Town.
That’s changing today. I’m meeting Birdrunner at lunch and we’re gonna do the death march today. Which means I’ll be exhausted tonight, but that’s cool. I’ve gotta get back to walking an hour + a day…especially since I have a half marathon to do in a few weeks. And if we’re gonna have Team Melf gear, then Melf herself had better not be shaming the team!
Internetz, have I ever told you how much I love sock monkeys?
Do you wanna know how happy I was when I arrived at El Jefe’s house Friday night to find this little happy waiting for me?
El Jefe wins bonus points and a cookie! Oh yes. I love my sock monkey hat. I will wear it and you will love me in it.
And you know what else happened that’s related to sock monkeys? Nemo (my 16 year old) gave me this sock monkey last night when I returned home. Yes, it was a sock monkey weekend all around!
The men in my life did all right by me this weekend. Yay!
Did y’all have a good weekend? I have stuff to catch up on, so fill me in!
Well the good news is, I’m still a Pisces. Whew.
I have to tell you, I’m not sure I want to be anything else, so if I had woken up yesterday to hear that I was now an Aquarius or an Aries or some brand new unpronouncable sign, I would probably have been upset. But since I’m still a Pisces, I’m all good. Also, CNN reports your Zodiak has not changed and why. If CNN says so you know it’s true because they are “The worldwide leader in news.” And a new Zodiak sign is big news, yo.
Yesterday was one of those days I would have happily erased from the calendar if I had a magic day eraser. It was absolutely, positively craptastic. But the good news is, I have some amazing friends and they really know how to make me feel better, no matter what’s going on. I am a lucky girl, no matter how unlucky I feel sometimes.
My horoscope says this is gonna be a banner month for me when it comes to love and money. I’ll raise my glass to that…
I am definitely wrong in all the right ways. Have a great weekend y’all!
My mom has often compared me to Penelope on Criminal Minds. I’m not sure if it’s because the character is always wearing bold colors, cool glasses, does funky stuff with her hair, or is curvy. (yes, CURVY. *koff*) Or maybe it’s a combination of all. Who knows.
Mom: THAT’S what you’re wearing today?
Me: No. I have on a whole ‘nother outfit underneath. This is my red
herring outfit.Mom: Don’t you have some different pants? (the horrid pants in question are black crop cargo pants that meet the top of my black boots.)
Me: Yes. They’re underneath the red herring pants.
Mom: We really need to talk about your hair.
Me: Oh?
Mom: Yes. You know you look like a cartoon, right?
Me: Yes! Thanks! I was going for Jessica Rabbit. How’d I do?
Mom: It’s the wrong color.
Me: Oh? More orange, less red?
Now don’t get me wrong, I love my momma with all my heart. These exchanges serve purely as entertainment. But sometimes, just one turn of phrase or comment in the right tone of voice can make me feel like I’m 12 years old again. How does she do that?
The good news is, I’ve completely reworked my entire wardrobe and am now sporting velour jogging suits, sweaters with puppies, kittens, and rainbows on them, pleated khakis, and SAS Shoes. Thanks Mom!
Okay, so most of you are adults (at least in age)…does your mom still do this to you?
For the past two years, instead of New Year’s Resolution, I chose three words to describe the previous year and three words to describe the coming year.
I was on vacation this year, and I didn’t get to do a Day the 1st posting…so I thought I’d rectify that somewhat…
2011 Day the 12th
My words for 2010
focused
sparkly
fun
Focused would be the one word that did not ring true for the entire year. I flailed a bit. I barely wrote & I got off my fitness routine.
But sparkly and fun? Hell yeah.
So let’s get to 2011.
I’m not going to describe the coming year in three words. I’m not going to continue to make resolutions such as “Be a more disciplined writer” like I did the past two years. (because let’s face it, I’m not a disciplined writer. Not even close. So why set myself up for failure that way?)
I have one goal and one goal only for this year: Move forward.
I spoke briefly on this at Fictionistas on Friday. I’m putting one foot in front of the other and getting my life back in order. Part of doing that is cutting the negative out of my life and leaving the past where it belongs. Now it’s time to focus on my present and move into my future.
I promise to sparkle hard while I move forward. I really look best in glitter, anyway. 🙂
“We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that people act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.” Charles R. Swindoll
Attitude is everything.
ETA: my friend Elen reminded me that one of my resolutions
from the past two years was to “Laugh everyday.” She gently nudged me to
continue to do that. So, I’m officially editing my resolution list:Move forward
Laugh everydayThanks Elen!
It was an Eskimo Ninja battle of epic proportions that was fought without honor. Blood was shed. It was awesome!
Ruby actually embraced the snow after a while. She ran and hopped and played until she started shivering so much I was afraid she was gonna give herself brain damage.
We built forts that were pretty awesome. Double A (my niece) and I built snow bricks with a box and a plastic basket. Eventually Rader left the team of 4 boys to join us…and our fort rocked. The boys just packed snow over some plastic containers. Our snow fort was actually a fort, thankyouverymuch. Girls rock!
After the fort was built, we began to stockpile our ammunition.
While this was going on, the boys sent Ian over to “spy” on us.
There were no clear winners (hahahaha we kicked ass!) but a good time was had by all!
In other news, the sun is out today and the snow is already starting to melt. Thank goodness. I already feel the cabin fever eating away at my brain. (Mainly because I don’t have cable TV and daytime TV sucks!) Yes, I know, I should be more productive and do something like clean my house or finish laundry–but it’s a snow day! Who wants to work on a snow day?
Hope all of y’all are safe, happy and warm. Currently, I’m dreaming of a beach side hammock, a cocktail, and sexy cabana boy named El Jefe serving my every whim… 🙂
did you click the link cuz you thought I was being dirty? Sorry to disappoint. Pure as snow here.
For reals.
The boys and I will be having an epic battle of snowballs today.
Yesterday, we spent a couple of hours pushing folks out of our ditches. People in the south just can’t drive in the snow. Plus, the roads got bad really fast. I-30 is closed and probably will be for a good long while.
Ruby isn’t a big fan. It’s way too deep for her little legs and it freaks her out. I like watching her hop around though… I’m mean, I know.
As much fun as we’re gonna have today, I can already tell you I’m ready for this stuff to go away. I like it in small doses. I like that usually the day after it snows, it’s sunny and 50 degrees. I’m not a fan of being trapped in my house…especially since I have no car. (It’s in the shop) Not that I’d be driving anywhere anyway. BUT if I had my car, the knowledge that I COULD drive somewhere would keep me from feeling so trapped.
I guess it’s a good thing that it snowed while my car was in the shop though. Now I don’t have to bum rides from everyone–including my mother. 🙂
Bitchin' Fiction: Musings by author Melissa McKenzie / Melissa Francis 
